When traveling with either your wife, girlfriend, side girlfriend, mistress, or hot intern you’re banging, etc., do you guys have a luggage policy? I believe that when it comes to luggage, the lighter the better, but in my experience some chicks think they can bring their walk-in closet to cover endless scenarios, despite that they will probably be naked a lot during the trip. I wouldn’t mind if chicks take care of their own stuff, but often the guy has to take care of the excessive baggage, and for some travel schedules is really a problem. Worst experience was with this chick in Europe when instead of bringing a backpack she almost brought the kitchen sink and obviously I had to carry most of her sh!t.
Just wait until a toddler enters the picture.
You can fondle the cube, but it will not respond.
I am very strict about luggage with girls I travel with. I travel a lot, much moreso than most girls I’ve traveled with, so I usually go over the night before and review / modify the packing situation. Usually it helps to just say, “hey, if you get over there and really need _____________ we’ll go shop for one” or something. They think, “shopping, yay!” and I think, “yeah, she’s gonna realize she doesn’t need __________ over there.” I went to Mexico for a month with a group in college, and the girls overpacked soooooo much. There were something like 17 girls to 5 guys so for the first week we were pack muling their sh*t around everywhere. To top it off, when we’d go out to eat, in groups, the guys would without fail get stuck holding the majority of the tab. After the first week, we just told them to basically “f*ck off” and left them to their own devices. It was actually only the clique of 4 “popular” girls that caused all the headaches, the rest were cool.
I can’t even imagine with a toddler.
Another rule I have, is when I go out in NYC or Vegas with a group, I usually wind up as coordinator, so I always mandate that all the girls have a pair of flats in their purse or the the guy they’re with has them stashed in their jacket. A couple years ago, I just finally got sick of girls standing around holding their shoes in their hand and whimpering at midnight when the night’s clearly going till 4 am because they didn’t pack appropraite footwear. Or you want to relocate to another bar 4 blocks away but they sandbag the idea because their feet hurt from the heels. Having spare flats in their purse or otherwise on their person makes everyone a happy camper.
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
travel light. and I’ve traveled with toddlers before, my god, that’s a nightmare. Definitely a big negative on the list of reasons for having kids
Hope. It is the quintessential human delusion, simultaneously the source of your greatest strength, and greatest weakness.
Agreed man, hauling an extra check on size luggage piece weighing 50 lbs (or whatever kids weigh these days) seems like a logistical nightmare.
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
You put yours in the luggage too?
They fit perfectly into a standard carry-on roller. I consider that a message directly from God that they belong in there.
You can fondle the cube, but it will not respond.
Studying With
I’m always a carry on only no matter where I am going unless I have golf or surf equipment.
Formerly ChickenTikka - Member of the Order of the Righteous Rusty Hacksaw
Girls bitching about their feet…over it.
I always trafel light. even with a 1 year old. We have managed to go skiing with 3 sets of ski-equipment and carrying a baby with just my husband and myself. so even with a baby you can travel light. just buy more like diapers and milkpowder on the spot.
haha, nice. I would love to be in charge of a large group of chicks during a trip: “Alright it’s time to go! …. don’t complain about your feet later, bitches!”
ditto, then not only do you have less stuff to carry, you don’t have to wait around to pick up your checked bags
———————————————– Trust God and keep your powder dry ———————————————– Southern by the grace of God
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I have collapseable ski polls. I tried to take them through security in my carryon in February claiming that it was a cane and that I was a gimp. No success.
Formerly ChickenTikka - Member of the Order of the Righteous Rusty Hacksaw
The carry-on only strategy is starting to backfire. Unless you are one of the first 10 people on the plane anymore, it seems like the overhead bins are full and you have to gate check any carry-on bigger than a dopp kit. On a recent flight to South America (with a lengthy layover in Miami), American Airlines actually expected us to move all our toddler’s food, milk, medicine, etc. from a wheeled carry-on to my wife’s purse and my laptop bag and gate check our bag all the way through to our final destination (i.e. we woudn’t even get it back in Miami). My wife got into an argument with the gate agent and we were a few minutes away from security being called. I finally intervened and said fine we’ll move the stuff on the jetway. Once we were out of sight of the agent, I ripped the check tag off the bag and carried it on. Overhead space was tight, but we found a spot for the bag.
You can fondle the cube, but it will not respond.
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You’re one of these people that takes toddlers on transcontinental flights? If I had it my way the airlines would put your children in the luggage compartment with their strollers.
Formerly ChickenTikka - Member of the Order of the Righteous Rusty Hacksaw
^ It’s actually intercontinental, transcontinental is across a continent.
You can fondle the cube, but it will not respond.
Yep, not gonna lie. I personally think toddlers should be banned from intercontinental flights. Each airline should have like one flight each day or every several days that goes between countries that allows toddlers and that’s it. Flying to Dubai was the freaking worst. Pulled two consecutive all nighters to make the trip happen then got stuck on a middle seat between Indians with no concept of private space. They’d just drop stuff in your lap like blankets and sh*t and leave it there. My section had no less than 8-10 screaming babies. Sucked soooo bad.
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
Studying With
I’m bringing blow darts next time to knock your kid unconscious.
Formerly ChickenTikka - Member of the Order of the Righteous Rusty Hacksaw
Studying With
Indians fly with babies a lot. My guess is because they are free. India loves value for money.
Formerly ChickenTikka - Member of the Order of the Righteous Rusty Hacksaw
Similarly, I think parents that take screaming toddlers out to nice restaurants are mega selfish. I always just figure when I hear a baby screaming that somewhere in that same restaurant is probably a couple that took the time and effort to hire a baby sitter so they could get away from the screaming kids for one night, just to be subjected to some other irresponsible parents’ child screaming at the next table over.
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
Having babies can never be considered a good value for money prop.
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
I didn’t mention it in my coverage, but my trip to Omaha and back was pretty crappy. If I hadn’t done only carry-on luggage, I think it probably could have gone worse.
Original departure: NYC to O’Hare, O’hare to Omaha. Planned arrival time: 3:45PM Omaha time.
What actually happened: NYC to Houston. 5 hour delay in Houston. Arrival time actually like 6:30PM.
Original return flight: Omaha to O’Hare, O’Hare to NYC. Planned arrival: 7PM NYC time.
What actually happened: Omaha flight boarded about two hours after planned time. Got to O’Hare to find that my 4PM connection was also delayed, so I wasn’t going to miss it, but it didn’t matter because the backlog of flights was so deep that my wait was another 4 hours or so. Ended up arriving in NYC at about 11:15PM feeling pretty wretched.
TL;DR - The golden age of air travel is safely behind us. Don’t check bags if you can avoid it by packing intelligently.
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Wrong, In India baby boys are essentially your 401k, and as for the girls, well that’s why we have ultrasounds and abortions.
Formerly ChickenTikka - Member of the Order of the Righteous Rusty Hacksaw
Still not a value prop. Even in India, probably much better off just saving a 401k rather than raising a child.
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
Please share your feelings with a harried mother the next time you are at the airport. I’m sure your beneficiaries will enjoy the payout.
You can fondle the cube, but it will not respond.
Right, I have no sympathy for mothers always whining about their choice to have a kid as if they’re some saint and billions of women haven’t done the exact same thing before them. Look, I’m in my late 20’s and all I hear about is single girls whining and crying because they’re afraid they won’t get married and if they don’t have children they just won’t feel validated. And in 5 years I’m going to have to listen to all those same women b*tch and moan about their stressful lives with children as if this is some burden that was just arbitrarily placed on them. And the world should all be thankful to them for their sacrifice to bring their unique little snowflake into existance, because what the world desperately needs right now are more suburban American teenagers.
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
Plus, half of their problems are their own doing. In other countries / in the country where I was raised, it’s okay to let your kid cry in the next room for a little instead of having a dozen baby monitors and calling your sitter every 3 seconds to make sure the kid hasn’t been struck by an asteroid. ”Oh it’s so stressful, you have soccer practice and then piano lessons, and the PTA, then blah blah blah” stop pandering to your kids and give them chores instead. Problems solved.
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
Why wait for your next trip to the airport. I think you should print out this thread and distribute it at the nearest OB/GYN office and then see if you can make it to a pediatrician’s office for distribution before you bleed out.
You can fondle the cube, but it will not respond.
Yah man, overweight drama queens past their prime are sooooo terrifying. It’s funny, I never knew you were in a spineless relationship before.
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
I wish there were designated “no babies or fat people flights”. Nothing pisses me off more than to get into a tiny regional jet and have to shoehorn myself into my tiny seat next to a fat person.
I never check a bag if I can help it, not b/c of the money (I can expense it) but it’s the time. I don’t want to wait 15-20 minutes for my bag to come off because for some reason, my bag always comes off very slowly. Sometimes they steal my bag and check it anyway if I’m on one of those small regional jets.
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Bottom line, the only underwear bombers that I’m concerned with on airplanes are the little screaming rug rats shitting and puking rmselves into a screaming crying hissy fit. Bringing babies on a plane is a hate crime against mankind.
I was in first class, flirted with the kinda gay looking check in guy and got upgraded from business, flying back from London a few months ago. In walks a lady with three kids screaming at the stewardesses because no one offered to push her baby carriage through the airport.
Her kids screamed the entire flight. The only thing more annoying was that they were all under the age of five and occupying seats that cost 10k or more (first class from Miami to Bombay). Really if you are that rich, stick the kids in Econ with your nanny.
Send the screaming babies to Gitmo. They are terrorists.
Formerly ChickenTikka - Member of the Order of the Righteous Rusty Hacksaw
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