An Augustinian confession for you all: something I’m not proud of but nonetheless can’t help.
A lot of girls that I dated have been getting married lately. They post these pictures of them up on facebook looking all coked up on love in their wedding dresses and what not.
While I am genuinely happy for them, the d-bag in me can’t help but get a bit gleeful everytime I see one of these photos, bride and groom posed for perfection along with dozens of well-wishers saying things like, “You guys are so cute! XOXOXOXX LOVE!!!!” and crap like that with 120 people “Liking this.”
The reason I get all gleeful is that I just desperately wanna comment, “I got there first buddy, i made the shores a little wider for you, so you can thank me for making it nice and rooomy in there for you. Yep buddy, you bet I still have the video your wife and I made together where we do everything imaginable, things she probably won’t even let you do to her. To think that she kisses your children with those lips today.”
Feel free to post your own confession.
…pics or it didn’t happen.
Cities teem with evil and decay, let’s give it a good shake and see what falls out!!
Congratulations?
“I’m a CPA! I got money b***h!”
Faith in humanity after reading this= Faith in humanity before reading this - 42
______________________________________________________
You must be the square root of two cause i feel irrational around you
http://alphahive.wordpress.com/
Dumb. And insecure. But mostly dumb.
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
If you’re nailing hot women left and right, why do you bother to film your encounters? You can’t possibly have time to watch them all and why would you even want to since you’re going to have another encounter later that night? That would be kind of like Nolan Ryan keeping clips of striking out batters.
You can fondle the cube, but it will not respond.
So, marriage is all about sex? If I didn’t get to her first, then I shouldn’t marry her?
Crap, I proposed for the wrong reasons
^+1
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
If you really slayed so many dimes you wouldn’t have had to move to a 3rd world country to nail fobby chicks with no possibilty of getting out of poverty, nor would you care about what your exes are doing on the book.
And why does it bother you so much?
I’m all for guys spreading their seed and being as sleezy as possible while they’re young… but if you really want to brag about it, do it in LA or NYC w/ 10’s instead of competing in the special olympics, India of all places.
“special olympics, India of all places.”
Wow, take that, Indians!
“I’m a CPA! I got money b***h!”
Studying With
Just saw this thread, was busy b@ngin CT’s future girl. Confession/
Poor CT, somebody broke his heart.
“Some people make shoes. Some people make houses. We make money and people are willing pay us a lot to make money for them.”
^ This
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
he sounds bitter in his last few postings, likely got dumped and needs an e-testosterone booster. dont be too harsh on the poor fellah
Never thought of that. Maybe his one true love just married some other dude. Sorry CT, my heart goes out to you.
You can fondle the cube, but it will not respond.
For your sake, I hope you’re happily married with an incredibly hot wife… cause otherwise, this is just sad.
Damn son, I think we might be soulmates, (no Homo).
Alot of the shorties I banged out in the past are now getting married, it really has no emotional effect on me at all. The only thought I have is that I must be getting old. Well, except for one that got away while I was studying for level two and thats mostly because its hard to find pretty, emotionally stable, non fobby, asian chicks who stand at 5’1” and carry 36Cs….believe me on that.
Tikka, you a real b____ for thinking that…..just be happy for other people…..hating never made anybody any money…..
It’s good to see all those girls improving themselves now. A lesson to never give up ;)
Studying With
Confession: I recieved oral from an overweight (female) cabby at my buddies bachelor party once. I regret nothing.
FTFY
Respect
I know, I couldn’t be happier for anybody that I used to be with… especially since I really have no emotional attachement and it cost me nothing for them to be happy.
I think the other posters are right, CT is butt hurt, happens to us all. He also implies that every girl he got with was a virgin before he tapped that… those chicks have prolly been gapped by a few dozen guys before he got to them, so that’s beyond wishful thinking.
Of all those things you listed above, emotionally stable is the hardest to find. You can pick any 2 when it comes to women: Smart, Sane, or attractive
I like this. I have often felt the same way. My trio was always (in no particular order): attractive, smart, and nice. I wanted all three, but historically, I’ve only managed to get two out of three. Maybe I should lighten up on the “nice” part and just hope for “sane.” ;-)
These days, I try to find someone who meets minimum standards on all three, and is exceptional on two. But even that is tricky.
You want a quote? Haven’t I written enough already???
I dont think that sane is a lower level of nice, or that they’re mutually exclusive or anything. Nice people can be very CrAzY!
As I get older (27 now), I’m seeing relationships or being single as an equity risk premium type trade off (although Im not sure whch side has the premium, haha)… things have to be worse sometimes to be better on average. Everything in life is a trade off, you’re not going to get a girl that makes a ton of money, never has a bad day, is smoking hot and etc. It just depends what you’re willing to sacrfice.
This doesn’t mean you should settle for some gnarly heffer, still do the best you can. It just means that women are basically retarded and they’re gonna suck sometimes (no pun intended)
Studying With
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2012/02/21/why-men-are-settling-for-mrs-good-enough.html
Fisher, a research professor at Rutgers University, explains it this way. “We have a stereotype in this culture that it’s men who are the ones who don’t want to commit, who don’t want to settle down, who are the scarce resources. But in fact, it’s the opposite.” As one married man in his 40s old her: “My wife isn’t perfect. She isn’t the best I’ve had in bed. But she’s a wonderful mother to our daughter, she’s very helpful in our business life, and we get along very well.’”
“Some people make shoes. Some people make houses. We make money and people are willing pay us a lot to make money for them.”
In my mind, “nice” included “sane” as a prerequisite, but I agree that, technically, one might want to make a distinction. Nice was simply my way of categorizing a personality.
You want a quote? Haven’t I written enough already???
[/quote]
Of all those things you listed above, emotionally stable is the hardest to find. You can pick any 2 when it comes to women: Smart, Sane, or attractive
[/quote]
well said
confession: I got a bit too slammed one night and hooked up with an AFer
ACEaceAnaltiCalteEquityACEanalticalteequityACE
http://tinyurl.com/axn8cua
aceofheartscapitalmanagement@_____________
Dude, seriously? We made a f*cking pact man…. not cool, brah.
I used to smoke pot and go to class.
Sneak in ten minutes late with a bullsh*t excuse.
Slink down low at my desk.
Pray to god nobody asked me any questions.
I was the best teacher ever.
^ lol my bad … brah hahaha
ACEaceAnaltiCalteEquityACEanalticalteequityACE
http://tinyurl.com/axn8cua
aceofheartscapitalmanagement@_____________
Studying With
I think you guys got the wrong idea here, which is probably my fault.
These are sorority type girls that I slept with in College and never had a serious thing with - I am not friends on FB with any chick that broke my heart - would you be? The girls I’m talking about I haven’t even seen since I graduated. That’s why I’m facebook friends with them. I haven’t friended anyone on FB in years pretty much since I left college.
Not sad and not hating on their love. Quite legitimately happy for them - everyone needs somebody. Part of me just finds it quite amusing that these girls, who were in all honesty slutty, are now married and having kids living “monogonous” relationships.
I’ll give you one example. One chick I banged was well known for letting guys snort cocaine out of her butt. Now, she’s on facebook in her wedding dress next to her husband. I wonder if he is aware that he is married to a chick that everyone called, “Coke Butt?”
One more thing, I called this an Augustinian Confession for a reason - (For all your quant jocks that have never read a book in your life http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Confessions_%28St._Augustine%29).
I know it’s base and low to feel the bizarre sense of pride and glee about this that I do, hence the first line of my post. I bet most of you have too at some point in your life. Forgive me our Father for our sins.
Formerly ChickenTikka - Member of the Order of the Righteous Rusty Hacksaw
Pages