So many people trying to justify their life decisions and how everyone else makes wrong choices. I’m happy that everyone is living the optimal life of their choosing. However, having to impress on others how optimal that is says its own message.
You have to say it in a Borat voice as well. I like-a you. Do you like-a me?
I’m not saying wealthy people don’t spend their cash. I’m saying wealthy people don’t take cheesy pictures of their jet or Bentley and post them on Facebook with silly hashtags. #Highlife #Baller Whatever. That a generalisation of course, but I find it fairly true for my circle of friends.
Meh, imagine that, people discussing lifestyles and then talking about their own experiences balancing the spend / save calculus. The gall, obviously they must be terribly insecure.
There’s nothing wrong with encouraging people to extend themselves along a path you took. For me, I almost never did those trips and it wound up being the best thing I did. Part of the reason I took the plunge was at the encouragement of others and my biggest regret has been not doing a semester in Europe (I did two in south and central america). I’d definitely push my kids with respect to that as well.
A couple I know went the no kids route and travels pretty much every weekend like noone I know. I love seeing the photos while I’m in my current holding pattern and would always encourage other people to go for it. It’s not about pushing for an “optimal lifestyle” whatever that is. For me, there’s something encouraging knowing that other people are still out there carrying the torch and frankly I’d encourage anyone to go for it if we’re on the topic.
idk where i was going with the 23 yo’s. it was more how i was saying it than the words themselves. it was funny to me. damn you, auto-accentuating word projecting software.
too much information there…
Lmao, bunch of zips in here need a whambulance. If you feel like shit seeing people live it up on social media then you derive happiness and self worth from external sources and your life is going to be a disappointment no matter how objectively successful you become - there will always be someone more baller than you. Y’all need some non-attachment in your lives.
EDIT: something I’ve seen that’s disturbing to me is people acting like one’s negative reaction to other people’s success is somehow not a choice. It absolutely is a choice. Choose gratitude and abundance and that’s what the universe will send back to you.
Envy is a terrible thing. Honestly, I tell people all the time to just focus on themselves. if someone were to ask me waht my biggest weakness is, its probably that im cheap as hell. if something is expensive i restrict myself (i got amazing self control). a friend of mine who does a blue collar job went out with me and he was incredulous that i wasnt down to pay a $5 cover given that i make a bunch. i ran him the numbers, i go out 2x a week, thats 10 bucks a week, 52 weeks i na year. thats 520 bucks. he asked me what i was doing it all for? and honestly, i want financial independence. i do not want to depend on human capital. i want cap gains and dividends. so in the process i saved a crazy amount of money these last 5 years ive worked (prolly 50% to 75% of income).in any case, even though i lived a miser, i still had a lot of fun. i just did a lot of research to determine good value fun like it was a financial investment. bottom line everyone has different aspirations. i got a friend in the same boat as me whose goal is to chase tail (throws money at it). a friend of mine who is rich wants to be a rap artist. another 1 who is super rich wants to be the next governor of california. i am very jealous of friends with money cuz they can do whatever they wants. they can afford mistakes. but what can i do. so i just focus on how to be a better person, how to achieve my goals in order to achieve the respect and admiration of others. its the only thing money cant buy.
In contrast, what bs said is true. i’ve talked to many people about this from different ages. 1 can only party when young. as you get older, if you want to do same things. you’re gonna have to pay a premium for it.haha
btw read the bottom links. i found it inspirational since it is linked to waht i want to do. I am actually considering saying **** it, and retire when im 30 in the philippines. the conflict between personal happiness and the desire to be a better person.
http://www.financialsamurai.com/the-average-net-worth-for-the-above-average-person/
Charlie Munger said " Envy is a really stupid sin because it’s the only one you could never possibly have any fun at."
While I’m on quotes, back in my dealership days, there was this commercial that looped occasionally on the interactive display in the showroom right outside my office. It said “Never look back, never stop pushing forward. Because the only race that maters, the one with yourself, is never over.” Focusing on yourself is best.
I saw this with a couple of my now former coworkers; 1 guy got a decent raise and immediately went out and bought a new truck when his existing entry level luxury car worked fine. This same guy spends like ~$7-8 a day on breakfast from the really expensive place next to the office. Another girl bought a fully loaded SUV that was probably 1/2 her annual salary, if not a bit more after she moved to our company and presumably got a raise.
I try to keep my fixed costs as low as possible, like house, car, all that jazz. If I really wanted to I could probably pay off my mortgage by 2020, maybe a couple of years longer, and be completely debt free. Don’t think I want to do that because I value the flexibility of having savings and investments, but it’s a nice option.
Just wanted to register one of those times when I heartily agree with TF.
^ see now I figured you would disagree with me on that. you know, the whole all powerful social/cultural oppression type reasoning.
You need to accept that you can be wrong sometimes.
Yeah, I always bring up this paper out of Wharton; decreasing happiness in both men and women, but even more so for women. http://www.utdallas.edu/negcent/seminars/stevenson/Paradox%20of%20declining%20female%20happiness.pdf
As far as attributions, I think people never back out far enough to see what’s up – it’s the delta between the environment the animal was evolved for, and the current environment , which drives a population wide decrease in happiness.
People in developed societies like the US are living a weird life where gender roles don’t make any sense, political correctness goes against instinct, food is poison, cube lifestyle is unhealthy, no vacation, tech/social media instead of real friends, everyone is on drugs…and the money doesn’t change these things. Meanwhile you have some peasant in the third world, with no money, but a small delta, who is happy as a clam.
I feel like this sometimes. I am very competitive.
got a guy who went to my hs who started a company that got bought out by square. if i had to guess he prolly received 10m in square stock. then the ipo of square went up 50% 1st day ipo. so that nigga is prolly richest mofo in our hs. lucky dude.
Sometimes I feel like an alien. I look at my wifes social media on occasion- I don’t do social media myself because I’m a pretty terrible person so I honestly and truly don’t care about your kids or your family vacation or liking a shitty email forward to show I love me some gays or Obama or whatever- and I’m always dumbfounded by people running the rat race while being outwardly unhappy. It’s great that you have a house you can’t afford and a car you can’t afford and an empty 401K where you’d put Madison and Jackson’s college money if you hadn’t spent that in Cancun, but every time we talk you’re very clearly unhappy.
I’m by and large a fuck-up. I think starting off adulthood in a massive hole completely altered my approach. Drop out of college, have a kid and dig yourself a $250K debt hole by 25 and you’ll start playing the long game in a hurry. I don’t pretend that I’m living optimally as Ohai mentioned earlier, because that ship sailed 12 years ago. But things like a big house and a new car and great vacations stopped being an option a long time ago. When you stop going to work to compete in the “things war,” you start making a lot more choices that seem to contribute to happiness, at least for me. More savings, more debt servicing, investing in self-improvement, investing in my kids future at the expense of my own, etc.
There is an outside chance that 2016 will be the year we return to a positive net worth. My house is a small story and a half in a neighborhood far too urban for most of the rat racers, and my car is old enough to get a drivers license now,but there is actually light at the end of my tunnel. While many of my peers are doing objectively well in their careers, they are just now having kids and seeing the light in their tunnels dim for the next 2 decades. Perhaps mine is just a story about 1 person making the best after some bad decisions, but part of me wonders if the hardships -self imposed as they were- allowed me to avoid the “temporarily embarassed millionaire” mindset that so many people seem to hold. Put differently, did I get an accidntal 10 year head start on reality?
^ i’m curious but how did you dig yourself so deep with no assets to show for it? crank?
I think if you are using other people’s situations as a benchmark for your own happiness or self worth then you are always going to fall short. Once you start measuring your acheivements by the goals you have accomplished in comparison to where you started then the joy you derive will be real and lasting. As for all of you running the rat race, being a BSD banging HCBs, traveling, and enjoying the finer things- good on you. And as for all of you building a family and enjoying the simpler things in life- good for you as well. No one’s path should define your own.
the difficult thing is that without a frame of reference, like peer comparisons, how do you know if you’re doing good or doing $hitty? by your reasoning, because i can chew and swallow food i should think i’m a champion.