Yes, that instantly occurred to me also (I searched for that detailed story but couldn’t find it). For some reason I thought he told us his father ended it this way also. And his moody aunt disowned him (another detailed story). So sad, as he said in his letter he as an “adult orphan”.
A lot of things seems to have happened that contributed to this situation (that being one of them). I’m going to be really mean, but overall, it seems like he just had really bad role models and a total lack of familial relationships. His dad was also an unemployed PhD and his stepmom just squandered what remaining resources they had inherited. None of these people had any idea of how to make a living, nor did they provide him with a stable household to grow up in. bchad himself never married, and despite his superior intelligence, never held a real job and never learned how to take care of himself. He basically became his parents. His financial difficulties were just a symptom of these things he was brought up with.
What got to me most was in the end of his letter, when he started writing about erosion of democracy due to socioeconomics, and other things that were in a very bchad esque academic fashion. He really was himself until the end, and I suspect that he had thought about this action for a long time, which is why he was so calm about it. Disappointment and hopelessness were just things he had accepted for himself, and that was truly a waste.
Also before getting used to stuff in the U.S I always thought people were laid off/unemployed for a good portion of their careers. My understanding from so many of his posts and seeing him talk about this issue gave me that impression, I always thought if he cannot get a job and is unemployed then not many people can ! So many of his posts dealt with this issue, it was later that I found out that perhaps Bchads wide spectrum of interest and his overthinking could have played a large role in developing someone to be a good university professor in liberal arts but not so much a Wall Street type of a guy.
It sickens me that someone like him had to teach literature at a local community college while some far less intelligent and smart people get tenure due to political moves.
If you are referring to a Kingsborough College professor, it wasn’t him, it is someone with the same name. There was a correction in the article later.
A lot of good points there, Ohai and SCR.
I think you assign too much weight on a parental influence, esp on someone in their late 40s.
Not mean, important to learn from these things.
Family is really important, there are so many people these days in their 40s+ living alone, but when things get bad (which they inevitably do), who will be there to help? Friends aren’t enough, you need family. And parental influence is huge, so many people in the end go down the same path as their parents.
Disagree, I don’t think parental influence or lack thereof can be overstated. Even those who don’t claim an impact are often just not realizing it. Don’t take my word for it, Bchad was 48 years old and still opening up about these impacts.
And bad parental influence is double hard to deal with, because some of it is hard-coded (biological).
His parents sound like mine, hugely talented and hugely irresponsible. I’m wired that same way, and it’s not just learned, it’s biology. But I realized if I lived that “dreamer life”, I’d go bankrupt. So made a conscious decision to become responsible, make rational decisions, study CFA, practice disciplined investing. But my brother is following exactly in our parents’ footsteps, without even realizing it. People have a hard time seeing the parental influence themselves, I guess it’s at the subconscious level or whatever.
^gambler? those bacc tables are unforgiving
^ Fortunately not gambler, I got “free-spirited fiercely-independent dreamer” category parents, which spells either Steve Jobs, or bankruptcy. For most bankruptcy!
Bchad was also in the wrong industry. Finance is for artisans, not artists like bchad.
I’ve never posted but have lurked for a while, and his was a perspective I was always attentive to. He was well thought-out and considerate. Yes he was brilliant, but more importantly I think, he simply came across as a generous man, and a very decent human being. He was very much so a pillar of the forum. I’ve never met or spoken to Bruce, but I feel compelled to share how much I appreciated his presence. My thoughts and prayers go to his family, friends, and members of this community. It is tragic that a man of his gifts and apparent character has come to feel hopeless in a world that should be embracing him. Find Peace.
Read his posts in the Robin Williams thread. He used those as template for his farewell letter.
The real issue is being sidestepped. 4 times more men successfully commit suicide than women. 80% of the homeless are men. Young boys are dropping out of high school at twice the rate young girls are. Men receive 4 times less funding for health and cancer research despite dying earlier. If those numbers were reversed, there would be one taxpayer funded program after another to fix the issue and manshaming would hit record levels. The day men start seriously tackling this crisis and start mobilizing people to raise awareness to them is the day there will be less tragic events like Bchad’s.
^ I agree. It’s sad that people are more concerned about the feelings of some over the lives of others.
I am not saying the parents had no influence, but most likely the issue was more complex than “it’s all my parent’s fault”.
Where’s Itera?
His performance leading up to the election was unsustainable. I’m guessing he simply overheated.
I think your parents have a big impact on you no matter what age. You never really “escape” them because that’s the way one is raised. Unless Bruce had another role model he could look up to such as an uncle, I don’t think he really got over it. He was getting help from therapists.
Both of your posts are extremely true. In society, men just don’t have the support that women have when it comes to mental illness. Might be a stigma there because men are supposed to be strong, independent and stoic.
If you don’t have family, you need really close friends. If women get together after a year of not seeing each other, they will get into detail about everything: career, love life, family. If men get together, this is how conversations usually go, “How’s it going? What’s keeping you busy”. “Oh y’know. Job, wife, kids”. That’s it.
If men need emotional support, the one person they usually turn to is their spouse and depending on that relationship, it could be a bad thing (not specific to Bruce, just in general).