Oversold LinkedIn Profiles

[H_P_Flashman]

@numi

+1.

H.P. Flashman, way to make a grand appearance on the forum. Welcome and hopefully you’ll stick around.

Appreciate it. When I actually start studying for level II I’ll be posting a lot less, but I’ll still be around. I work with PalacioHill, who tells me he’s going to stop posting. So it’s going to basically be a wash for the forum. I’ll try to post some race-theory nonsense to fill his hole.

[itera]

@Vandelay_Industries

. I had been told time and time again that it doesnt matter where you go to school and I shouldnt worry about going Ivy League. they told me that state schools were great and that it doesnt matter where you go in the real world. Then I was told that grades didnt matter and that getting a job was more based on being likable.

This is exactly like when an ugly person tells their ugly daughter that looks don’t matter and that it’s the inside that counts.

[Vandelay_Industries]

@lxwarr30

1. Get ride of the details section and put in other way.

Exams: Passed CFA Level 1, XX ACT Score, XXX GMAT SCORE

Interests: Golf, Trivia, XX

Skills: SQL (Beginner)

Put the clubs under your education, put minor accounting under education

2. your whole resume is a big paragraph that doesnt focus enough on your transferable skills

3. why is your personal training presented as if it’s a financial analyst role? talk about how you had to sell your services, build client relationships, upsell shit. idk but making it like “yea i used excel to work out” screams bullshit.

4. put your mba summer internship at the top of your experience. it’s your most revelant job.

5. get ride of some stuff and put some spaces in between jobs or sections

6. remove the ranking from your mba or put it on your undergrad. you can’t have it both ways

thanks for the thoughts and the time.

1. I really like this point. Will try it.

2. How do you suggest improving that?

3. Because there were skills used in the job that transfer to finance. They would rather hear about my excel usage and forecasting than my sales or quality of training results IMO.

4. Not a bad idea. I was afraid it might appear I didn’t know how to format a resume if I did that

5. You’re right. I need to. Deciding what to get rid of is tough.

6. I actually have it as well, just not on this copy. So I do have it on there

thanks again

[Vandelay_Industries]

@Vandelay_Industries

@H_P_Flashman

^ That looks better than I expected. Highlighting your reading score on the ACT is really bizarre, though.

thanks. I spent a lot of time on it. I’m pretty pleased with it. I thought adding that could attest to my critical analysis abilities.

how should I remedy this situation?

[Vandelay_Industries]

@itera

@Vandelay_Industries

. I had been told time and time again that it doesnt matter where you go to school and I shouldnt worry about going Ivy League. they told me that state schools were great and that it doesnt matter where you go in the real world. Then I was told that grades didnt matter and that getting a job was more based on being likable.

This is exactly like when an ugly person tells their ugly daughter that looks don’t matter and that it’s the inside that counts.

i now know this. Didn’t at the time. One of my biggest regrets. Nothing I can do about it now

[lxwarr30]

@Vandelay_Industries

@lxwarr30

1. Get ride of the details section and put in other way.

Exams: Passed CFA Level 1, XX ACT Score, XXX GMAT SCORE

Interests: Golf, Trivia, XX

Skills: SQL (Beginner)

Put the clubs under your education, put minor accounting under education

2. your whole resume is a big paragraph that doesnt focus enough on your transferable skills

3. why is your personal training presented as if it’s a financial analyst role? talk about how you had to sell your services, build client relationships, upsell shit. idk but making it like “yea i used excel to work out” screams bullshit.

4. put your mba summer internship at the top of your experience. it’s your most revelant job.

5. get ride of some stuff and put some spaces in between jobs or sections

6. remove the ranking from your mba or put it on your undergrad. you can’t have it both ways

thanks for the thoughts and the time.

1. I really like this point. Will try it.

2. How do you suggest improving that?

3. Because there were skills used in the job that transfer to finance. They would rather hear about my excel usage and forecasting than my sales or quality of training results IMO.

4. Not a bad idea. I was afraid it might appear I didn’t know how to format a resume if I did that

5. You’re right. I need to. Deciding what to get rid of is tough.

6. I actually have it as well, just not on this copy. So I do have it on there

thanks again

2. Write clever lines not laundry lists

3. People want to know you’re good at what you set your mind on. Maybe someone with more hiring experience can attest differently, but I have been interviewing people for entry roles. I would rather you paint this as an experience about being an entrepenuer/having client relationship/time management than you pretending u did analysis.

4. Get ride of the paragraphy format and it will clear space. If not remove some the project lines and tighten up the summer camp into one thing. You shouldn’t have one bullet point under one thing and 10 under another.

5. I’d remove it because it comes off silly. If I don’t know your school some random ranking percentile won’t change the fact. Sell yourself not your school/company brand (because it’s hacksaw).

[Vandelay_Industries]

@lxwarr30

@Vandelay_Industries

@lxwarr30

1. Get ride of the details section and put in other way.

Exams: Passed CFA Level 1, XX ACT Score, XXX GMAT SCORE

Interests: Golf, Trivia, XX

Skills: SQL (Beginner)

Put the clubs under your education, put minor accounting under education

2. your whole resume is a big paragraph that doesnt focus enough on your transferable skills

3. why is your personal training presented as if it’s a financial analyst role? talk about how you had to sell your services, build client relationships, upsell shit. idk but making it like “yea i used excel to work out” screams bullshit.

4. put your mba summer internship at the top of your experience. it’s your most revelant job.

5. get ride of some stuff and put some spaces in between jobs or sections

6. remove the ranking from your mba or put it on your undergrad. you can’t have it both ways

thanks for the thoughts and the time.

1. I really like this point. Will try it.

2. How do you suggest improving that?

3. Because there were skills used in the job that transfer to finance. They would rather hear about my excel usage and forecasting than my sales or quality of training results IMO.

4. Not a bad idea. I was afraid it might appear I didn’t know how to format a resume if I did that

5. You’re right. I need to. Deciding what to get rid of is tough.

6. I actually have it as well, just not on this copy. So I do have it on there

thanks again

2. Write clever lines not laundry lists

3. People want to know you’re good at what you set your mind on. Maybe someone with more hiring experience can attest differently, but I have been interviewing people for entry roles. I would rather you paint this as an experience about being an entrepenuer/having client relationship/time management than you pretending u did analysis.

4. Get ride of the paragraphy format and it will clear space. If not remove some the project lines and tighten up the summer camp into one thing. You shouldn’t have one bullet point under one thing and 10 under another.

5. I’d remove it because it comes off silly. If I don’t know your school some random ranking percentile won’t change the fact. Sell yourself not your school/company brand (because it’s hacksaw).

your two posts have been the most constructive, helpful, realistic, and rational pieces of advice in this whole thread. Thanks for the time

[Robotech]

Great points Lxwarr30!

[AfricaFarmer]

Van delay you have been getting some grade A tailored advice throughout this entire thread, i really hope you take some of this on board.

[Vandelay_Industries]

@AfricaFarmer

Van delay you have been getting some grade A tailored advice throughout this entire thread, i really hope you take some of this on board.

Until Lxwarr30, the advice was nothing more than a bunch critcisms and blaming my ego and telling me to improve it.

[itera]

@Vandelay_Industries

Until Lxwarr30, the advice was nothing more than a bunch critcisms and blaming my ego and telling me to improve it.

lol hearing only what you want to hear… good luck with that in future endeavors.

[Vandelay_Industries]

@itera

@Vandelay_Industries

Until Lxwarr30, the advice was nothing more than a bunch critcisms and blaming my ego and telling me to improve it.

lol hearing only what you want to hear… good luck with that in future endeavors.

No, it’s because my ego had zero to do with the problem. Everyone kept mentioning ego and that has nothing to do with it because jobs dont know anything about my personality from a resume submission. If I was interviewing and failing, then perhaps you would have a point.

[rawraw]

Vandelay, what does your resume look like? Does it contain “task, action taken by you, result attribute to you” language for each bullet point?

And everyone does have a point about your personality, although they probably were too abrasive for you to listen. I would’ve went the route of “While you seem to be driven and I’m sure you are a chill guy, the way you present yourself does not convey these traits. Instead, you come off as insecure and arragont.”

Better to be aware then unaware of this. But at the end of the day, you have to admit it first. I’m not knocking you, just letting you know man. We all have our quirks, but its easier to have those quirks after you are successful. #RealTalkforRealGs

[Vandelay_Industries]

@rawraw

Vandelay, what does your resume look like? Does it contain “task, action taken by you, result attribute to you” language for each bullet point?

And everyone does have a point about your personality, although they probably were too abrasive for you to listen. I would’ve went the route of “While you seem to be driven and I’m sure you are a chill guy, the way you present yourself does not convey these traits. Instead, you come off as insecure and arragont.”

Better to be aware then unaware of this. But at the end of the day, you have to admit it first. I’m not knocking you, just letting you know man. We all have our quirks, but its easier to have those quirks after you are successful. #RealTalkforRealGs

My resume is post 195 on page 6. I understand those comments, but again, im not sure what that has to do with my job prospects because I’m not getting invited to the interviews in the first place, based upon the resume. I could have the greatest personality in the world and it would not matter because I’m not being pursued and invited for interviews.

[rawraw]

@Vandelay_Industries

@rawraw

Vandelay, what does your resume look like? Does it contain “task, action taken by you, result attribute to you” language for each bullet point?

And everyone does have a point about your personality, although they probably were too abrasive for you to listen. I would’ve went the route of “While you seem to be driven and I’m sure you are a chill guy, the way you present yourself does not convey these traits. Instead, you come off as insecure and arragont.”

Better to be aware then unaware of this. But at the end of the day, you have to admit it first. I’m not knocking you, just letting you know man. We all have our quirks, but its easier to have those quirks after you are successful. #RealTalkforRealGs

My resume is post 195 on page 6. I understand those comments, but again, im not sure what that has to do with my job prospects because I’m not getting invited to the interviews in the first place, based upon the resume. I could have the greatest personality in the world and it would not matter because I’m not being pursued and invited for interviews.

The worst feeling in the world will be when you get to the interviews and have other things holding you back. Might as well work on the full package in preparation, right?

[Vandelay_Industries]

@rawraw

@Vandelay_Industries

@rawraw

Vandelay, what does your resume look like? Does it contain “task, action taken by you, result attribute to you” language for each bullet point?

And everyone does have a point about your personality, although they probably were too abrasive for you to listen. I would’ve went the route of “While you seem to be driven and I’m sure you are a chill guy, the way you present yourself does not convey these traits. Instead, you come off as insecure and arragont.”

Better to be aware then unaware of this. But at the end of the day, you have to admit it first. I’m not knocking you, just letting you know man. We all have our quirks, but its easier to have those quirks after you are successful. #RealTalkforRealGs

My resume is post 195 on page 6. I understand those comments, but again, im not sure what that has to do with my job prospects because I’m not getting invited to the interviews in the first place, based upon the resume. I could have the greatest personality in the world and it would not matter because I’m not being pursued and invited for interviews.

The worst feeling in the world will be when you get to the interviews and have other things holding you back. Might as well work on the full package in preparation, right?

fair point, but the people in this thread were acting as if that is what actually was holding me back, and thus far, that has not proved to be true.

When you go in for an interview, should you call the person Mr. xyz or by their 1st name?

[rawraw]

I am no Numi. I’ve just been torn apart by people who are Numi’s evil twins before and learned some tidbits. Take this for what its worth (not much)

@Vandelay_Industries

Personally, I’d collapse the details section. The thing I’d keep from it, I’d put at the section at the bottom like the IB template has on the website I think you got the resume from.

MBA FInance Intern Bullet 1 is pretty vague. I have no idea what you did.

MBA Finance Bullet 2 has no conclusion IMO. Did you find a one million dollar fraud? Did you prevent one? What specifically did you do in the software?

FOr personal training, you can leave it but I wouldn’t put any bullets underneath it. I may put it in the “Details” section at the bottom instead of work experience.

Golf Course I’d probably not put bullets either. I may even leave it off.

Selected project: bullet 1, what did the analysis result in? Did financial performance improve due to monitoring?

Bullet 4: Did you buy the real option? did it make money?

bullet 5: DId this impact anything? Was profitability increased? Were discussions more efficient?

I see a lot of stuff you’ve done, but not the results. And I’d use the white space created from deleting some stuff I highlighted above to include those results.

I’d also consider putting project experience after education, since it seems to be the main point you are trying to use to sell yourself. But if you fix the experience part, this will not be necssary.

[Vandelay_Industries]

@rawraw

I am no Numi. I’ve just been torn apart by people who are Numi’s evil twins before and learned some tidbits. Take this for what its worth (not much)

@Vandelay_Industries

Personally, I’d collapse the details section. The thing I’d keep from it, I’d put at the section at the bottom like the IB template has on the website I think you got the resume from.

MBA FInance Intern Bullet 1 is pretty vague. I have no idea what you did.

MBA Finance Bullet 2 has no conclusion IMO. Did you find a one million dollar fraud? Did you prevent one? What specifically did you do in the software?

FOr personal training, you can leave it but I wouldn’t put any bullets underneath it. I may put it in the “Details” section at the bottom instead of work experience.

Golf Course I’d probably not put bullets either. I may even leave it off.

Selected project: bullet 1, what did the analysis result in? Did financial performance improve due to monitoring?

Bullet 4: Did you buy the real option? did it make money?

bullet 5: DId this impact anything? Was profitability increased? Were discussions more efficient?

I see a lot of stuff you’ve done, but not the results. And I’d use the white space created from deleting some stuff I highlighted above to include those results.

Thanks for taking the time to respond.

1. MBA finance intern bullet is vague because what I shared was basically the extent of it. Im not sure what more I could add. I am already embellishing on it somewhat to jazz it up as is.

2. There is no conclusion. This was an internship. I wasn’t making big moves, I was just doing daily activities to help out.

3. So you think I should remove 4-5 years of work experience and make it look like all the work experience I have had is an internship and tutoring?

4. I’m not sure that it is as important to show what money was made by a hypothetical project in an academic setting as it is to just show that I have experience doing it in a semi-realistic setting. I think it is splitting hairs. It doesn’t affect the quality of the analysis or the experience as to whether the project has a positive or negative npv. That being said, I suppose it is something I can think about.

Thank you again very much for the time. It is very generous and kind of you to offer such thoughts. I truly appreciate it.

[IsThereAny]

@Vandelay_Industries

@itera

@Vandelay_Industries

Until Lxwarr30, the advice was nothing more than a bunch critcisms and blaming my ego and telling me to improve it.

lol hearing only what you want to hear… good luck with that in future endeavors.

No, it’s because my ego had zero to do with the problem. Everyone kept mentioning ego and that has nothing to do with it because jobs dont know anything about my personality from a resume submission. If I was interviewing and failing, then perhaps you would have a point.

Your ego/sense of entitlement shines through in your resume.

Ex (1): “94th percentile, Bloomberg (financial) Aptitude Test”

• If the person reading your resume cared about the results of this test, they would know it is a “financial” test and it comes across as insulting the reader’s intelligence by blatantly stating it.

Ex (2): “State U Intramural Sports Trivia Champion”

• lol

Lastly, take off the mickey mouse golf & camp counselor job. This isn’t high school anymore.

[Vandelay_Industries]

@IsThereAny

@Vandelay_Industries

@itera

@Vandelay_Industries

Until Lxwarr30, the advice was nothing more than a bunch critcisms and blaming my ego and telling me to improve it.

lol hearing only what you want to hear… good luck with that in future endeavors.

No, it’s because my ego had zero to do with the problem. Everyone kept mentioning ego and that has nothing to do with it because jobs dont know anything about my personality from a resume submission. If I was interviewing and failing, then perhaps you would have a point.

Your ego/sense of entitlement shines through in your resume.

Ex (1): “94th percentile, Bloomberg (financial) Aptitude Test”

• If the person reading your resume cared about the results of this test, they would know it is a “financial” test and it comes across as insulting the reader’s intelligence by blatantly stating it.

Ex (2): “State U Intramural Sports Trivia Champion”

• lol

Lastly, take off the mickey mouse golf & camp counselor job. This isn’t high school anymore.

Describing the type of exam I took shows entitlement and ego? You could argue that it is unneccessary information, but I don’t see how showing the type of exam shows a big ego. If anything, I think it shows a small ego and humility.

Intrmaural sports trivia champion is impressive imo. Not easy to be the biggest trivia guru out of 35,000 students. It’s an accomplishment and a point of pride. It also shows well-roundedness. Finally, one could argue it means one has a good good mind to be able to retain all the information and know all the answers.

I think working 90 hours a week and being chosen over 7 peers for a position are nice points. It shows im not afraid to work hard and be thought of as a top employee. It also shows i have the dilligence and quality performance to hold down a steady job for 2.5 years while attending school.