No offence, but if someone sent me a card (even worse, a gift!!!) I would think “What a loser!” This must be some weirdo American custom. Sucking up and networking seem to be far more important on your side of the pond. Europeans have the right idea here. Consider it for a moment… Is the guy going to get your cigars or wine or whatever and think “hey, we should really offer that guy a job… he sent us a present”. Would you still want to work for them? Really… I would never stoop so low… but, like I said, this must be some weird cultural difference.
Etienne Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > No offence, but if someone sent me a card (even > worse, a gift!!!) I would think “What a loser!” > > This must be some weirdo American custom. Sucking > up and networking seem to be far more important on > your side of the pond. Europeans have the right > idea here. Or…consider this: maybe it is you and your cronies that have it wrong here? Since when did writing a holiday card have to equate to “sucking up”? It’s what you make of it. You guys must have some seriously important stuff going on if you can’t take a few minutes to write a holiday card. Let me know when you find the cure to cancer or the solution to world peace.
^ I think you are approaching this the wrong way around. Your interviewer is not your friend. You’ve maybe spent 4-6hrs with him. Do you send a card to everyone you have spent 4-6hrs with? Be honest, the only reason you are sending a card is because he holds power over you. Hence, it’s sucking up.
No – actually had forgotten this thread was just about “networking” – but anyway, there have been instances where I’ve turned down jobs and still sent someone and holiday card, if they were someone I really admired and respected. Those industry contacts have come in handy for me at a later point…you work in finance, you must know what that’s like. But the people to whom I’ve written cards are ones that I would have liked in my life, regardless of whether they were in the same line of work and whether I had ever aspired to approach them for a job at a later time. My perspective on “networking” is that the best connections are forged with people that you’d respect and admire regardless of the field they were in.
numi Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > No – actually had forgotten this thread was just > about “networking” – but anyway, there have been > instances where I’ve turned down jobs and still > sent someone and holiday card, if they were > someone I really admired and respected. Those > industry contacts have come in handy for me at a > later point…you work in finance, you must know > what that’s like. But the people to whom I’ve > written cards are ones that I would have liked in > my life, regardless of whether they were in the > same line of work and whether I had ever aspired > to approach them for a job at a later time. My > perspective on “networking” is that the best > connections are forged with people that you’d > respect and admire regardless of the field they > were in. +1 – Also, there is def. a difference to schmoozing in expectance of some sort of return versus interacting with people because you genuinely care. Some schmoozers do genuniely care and others just schmooze/network for results (maybe like the initial post). I have found life a lot more fulfilling putting time into what I care about and talking to the people that have helped me along the way, or just a note/card not ever expecting anything in return. As an added bonus, when I least expected it, they were put into the position to help me out and it really made a difference in various stages of my life.
I have to agree with philip.platt here. What I forget sometimes is people have very different definitions about schmoozing. To be quite frank, I think people that are entirely focused on the bottom line as opposed to genuinely caring for others are not really so good at networking. Anyone perceptive can sniff these individuals out quickly, and I find that as I’ve gotten older, I’ve had less time for people who are just professional connections. They just aren’t that important to me, and I can’t expect to rely on them when it comes to something that really counts. I believe others in my role or that are more senior to me may have similar viewpoints as well. The only times I really pour time into “networking” is when I’m with people that I’m genuinely interested in, and I find that people that truly add value to my life are ones with whom I have more in common than just finance. I suppose I’m a “finance guy” by nature of my profession, but there are plenty of other things I enjoy doing. Importantly, it’s my character and personality that define who I am, rather than the work that I do. As such, it can be very fulfilling to develop relationships with people that extend beyond typical workplace conversations. I have always found it worthwhile to keep such people in my life.
If it works, it works. But for better or worst, there is a difference between the approach to this in the US and in Europe/UK. What I am saying is that I can see the logic in NOT sending a card, because I think it is insincere unless you have a close relationship with someone. Perhaps for this reason, but maybe for some other reason, it just isn’t the modus operandi here. I am glad that it isn’t too, because not having known anyone in Finance until I got my IB gig, I might not have gotten into the industry.