I’m really new at this online dating thing. Guy I thought I’d share my life with had a life crisis and disappeared. Obviously was devastated, and am trying to meet people just to see who’s out there.
Now, what happens if the people I meet via dating venues are the same people I’d meet via networking? Stop talking? Stop dating till I find a job? Leverage intense chemistry for position?
also, all comments along the lines of “what a dbag you’re better off without him” are welcome.
what a dbag you’re better off without him
Thanks. It helps.
Are you a woman or a dude that likes other dudes? If it’s the latter I’ll go tackle CvM before he gets his paws on this thread.
And, yes, go out and date.
And, yes, that dude was a total dbag.
Edit: just read your comments in the other thread. You appear to be female.
Tough luck losing the love of your life. If it was me, I would fall into a deep depression, get some tattoos and play Alanis Morisette music loudly to the annoyance of my elderly Polish neighbor, Mr. Gregor.
Anyway, is it hard to avoid dating people in your industry? Can’t you just un-select all the bankers in Snap Chat or whatever.
Losing friends/love is always painful, but whatever happens, happens for the best my friend… you deserve better. and trust me, time is the best medicine! give it time, meanwhile concentrate on other things, your hobbies, your career, on getting a job first. dont date for now, network!
Better off without the wanker. Sorry to hear. I am recently back in the dating game myself after a few years. Boy has it changed - tinder, snap chat, no phone calls, text only, bat shit crazy women, it is wild out there. When did women start drinking this much?
Get a dog.
I’d focus on finding a job, esp if you don’t have any.
Sorry about the breakup. If its recent, focus on yourself and your interests. Online dating is not exactly fun. But if you are ready, do it - just avoid finance guys for now.
You’ll be ok 
+1
Ohai, we are going to need to talk ha ha
Sorry to hear that, as said, time heals everything. Although this doesnt apply to all, stay away from us finance guys, we are (again, generalizing) a bunch of sociopaths. With this you can network and find a true gentlemen. Good luck
Why tattoos? I have never heard that tattoos would be helpful in such the case. Anyway, like your advice
@The OP: Time will heal. Learn to love yourself first. Remember life has many things to do out there. There’s a lot of fish in the sea, just make sure there’s no hole in your net :)). Btw, I saw your post in Careers section, personally I think you should pay more attention in getting a better job. It will keep you being busy and stay away from thinking too much about that relationship.
People in general don’t talk on the phone as much anymore. And it can get very akward with a stranger on the phone, plus you can exaust topics you could use on the first “date”. I think it’s easier to just meet for coffee and talk face to face.
Had a life crisis and disappeared? What a dbag, you’re better off without him.
What happened to good old social circle? Seriously, best method ever. All the crazy people are already filtered out to an extent.
Why people bother with tinder and all that garbage is beyond me.
Dating =/= networking. Keep them separate imo. Idk where you are, but there are certain places this is very difficult due to the amount of industry ppl (NYC being the obvious example). If you’re in one of those places, I wouldn’t say to ignore the ppl- but pick which way you’re going to go with it (dating or networking) and only treat it that way. If you chose dating, try to avoid finance talk altogether. Just my USD$.02.
I have a dog. She noticed that I was depressed, and tried to cheer me up by pooping everywhere. At night. Everywhere. I stopped moping around after that.
Thank you for the dbag comments. Honestly, this has really driven me to focus on my career search, and in a really immature way, I feel slightly smug about the whole thing–like look at what you threw away. It might not be healthy, but it sort of helps…
I guess I asked this because I found out (well, guessing really, but am pretty sure I am right) that this person I started talking to is working at a larger firm in the area (not many employers where I live, so it’s a really small community I feel like). Haven’t applied to this firm specifically, but who knows what may turn up. Just want to avoid any awkwardness, so I was wondering about protocol.
emichan, if this had been a couple years back, I would say sorry for your loss / what a dbag, you’re better off without him / find me on the “Hook Up” section of AnalystForum.
Gotta start with Level I first though…I’m all about taking things slow. You know. 
After reading this post, especially the comment about your little chow pooping all over the place, I realized you are probably cool as hell and better off not dating this dbag who likely doesn’t have his marbles together.
I will say that this is the perfect opportunity for you to focus on the things that make you feel happy and fulfilled. If that’s searching for stuff in a career, so be it. You’ll know when you’re ready to go out and meet new people. But in the meantime, why not hang out with your friends and not over-think things? Frequently, the best times I’ve had meeting people as prospectives dates were when I wasn’t looking at all. Let things be totally organic.
I had met one of my girlfriends from the past at one of these young professional mixers. Most of the guys attending were either looking to advance their career or to find a hook-up; I suspect the girls were looking for the same. I just came out of a relationship weeks prior, and ended up meeting a girl at this networking event. I realize about five minutes in that this girl knew the girl that had recently broken up with me since they were kids, not to mention that she worked at another investment bank basically down the Street and we already knew like 15 people in common. But rather than fretting about stuff like how it was a “small community” or whatever, or that I needed to leverage anything, I just decided to be chill, have a great time, and convince myself that I had a lot to offer. It was never about “her” and all about “me” – so I decided just to go into this thing being "business as usual. Ended up getting together with this girl and dated her for like a year and a half.
To your point about finance being a “small community,” guess what…the world is getting smaller and more interconnected every day, so you just need to decide whether you want to be the victor or the victim. So just go out and not give a crap, have an amazing time with your friends, go to some house parties or networking events…and let things happen. People spend way too much time caring what other people think, and not enough time making themselves as awesome as they can be.
You can even tell the story about how you have a dog that pooped all over the place because your last bf left you, and the dog was even more depressed about things than you were, but it was then that you realized that your dog was actually cuter than that dbag ex of yours…no offense. If I were a guy and heard that, I’d think “wow this girl is hilarious…AND an AnalystForum member?!” It would be game over…for me.
Go get 'em