http://time.com/3422624/report-millennials-marriage/
I’m firmly in the “haven’t found what I’m looking for” camp, aka, I’ve found what I’m looking for but they’re already taken or single and won’t date me.
Ha-ha-hacksaw!!!
When I was young and unmarried, I could pull strange like you wouldn’t believe. I was like John Travolta in MIchael.
Feminism has distorted the market and I don’t think that even time can bring it back to equilibrium as I firmly believe that biology is the main factor behind attraction. Don’t get me wrong, feminism has done a lot of good for society. Women bring more to society than just staying in the kitchen and being submissive. But, the movement came at a cost. The ultimate ironically, is what women desire the most: love and commitment.
You see, 50 years ago before birth control, abortion and women’s promiscuity, the risk reward of sleeping around in a dating phase was too high. You entered adulthood and got married. That’s what people did. Fast forward to today. Men do not need to commit to get laid anymore and face very few consequences of playing the field. But, not all men are created equal. As women are the more discriminatory gender, the top men (which I call the top 20%) are the main beneficiaries.
There are 2 universal truths (biological in nature): the vast majority of women want men at least as tall as them and men at least as successful as them. As women get more and more successful professionally, it gets harder for them to find an equivalent man. Very few women will lower their lifestyle to meet their partner’s one. A female lawyer is not marrying a male librarian still living in his bachelor pad. A male surgeon meanwhile feels comfortable marrying anything from a housewife to a hairdresser to a fellow surgeon.
The end result is that men at the top have more options than ever before and don’t have to commit to any of those options. Women as a group have raised their standards, now have less options (for marriage) and refuse to commit to anything below those standards.
^TBT
^ FT speaks da troof. #freeCvM
So I went on a date back in January with the unicorn. Attractive and intelligent, a couple years older than me and seemed sane, and I am 99% sure makes way more money than me. She declined to go out further with me despite saying she had a good time. She’s an investment banker and is now dating a guy who’s in IB too. Shocking?! Or not at all. It’s FT’s theory proved in reality.
FT is on it as usual, the market in the developed world is distorted. There’s a discord between current state aka “progress”, and biology/evolution. And there’s no real way to resolve that.
I think there’s a lot of bang for your buck and mispricing in the emerging market if you’re willing to take the risk.
That’s part of the reason I’ve said to friends that I need to return to Eastern Europe/Russia to find Mrs. Krazykanuck. Having been there on vacations the talent there is just unreal.
I think that women are actually more willing to marry or long-term-couple down than FT admits and it is happening more and more over time as society starts to be more accepting of women as primary breadwinners, and families decide to let whoever can earn more be the earner… However, I think that only kicks in at the upper parts of the wealth and income spectrum, where women decide that they can increase their pool of available suitors dramatically by expanding the lower limit down a bit. In the low and midrange incomes, however, I agree that most women do not want to risk coupling downward.
If fewer people are marrying now, is that necessarily a bad thing? Has the historical marriage rate been the optimal rate (and is this optimal rate constant throughout decades)? Greater life choices for women, if anything, should expand their horizon of optimal outcomes.
I don’t really know if selectivity has changed overall either, at least not due to relative societal rank. The daughter of a rich family in 1950s was probably not going to “marry down” into a lower class either, if it could be helped. The increase in selectivity would have to do with ability of women to be financially independent nowadays.
Women empowerment does shift the balance of societal control from men to women. So, as you observed, power of men in choosing women has decreased. But is this bad for everyone or just for 50% of the population?
Finally, while I agree that there will be “losers” among women - those who are too selective and end up alone forever - perhaps this utility loss is offset by the greater utility of those women who “win” through ability to select more desirable mates. So, this is a matter of equality, not median utility.
It could be worse of course.
http://www.newsweek.com/2015/06/05/gender-imbalance-china-one-child-law-backfired-men-336435.html
just mail her over
I ain’t taking possession without a field test. 
While this risks going OT, marriage =/= kids, and vice versa.
I’ve said it before, you’ve got to get em’ young. Have your fun til you’re 30, find someone early 20s and you’re set. You will be the mature older guy who has his shit together. She’s goin to be finishing up school and the rest will be history. They’re not as jaded, not as focused on marriage themselves and will appreciate the fact that you’re different than the knuckle draggers they’re been dealing with for the past four years.
KrazyKanuck - totally agree with you. Eastern european women just have a different mindset. smokeshows as well
I see this trend as well, and I think it’s a decent option. The only thing about having a woman as a breadwinner is that her life long earnings (relative to a male equivalent) will be lagging. Therefore that type of household would need to be more conservative (aka live way below their means) with their finances.
Have Igor date a few Ukrainians/Russians, then recommend some to you.
I would probably won’t marry which is unusual for an Indian guy but I think if I am gonna stay here forever then probably it’s a good option. Bringing a wife from India is a terrible option and marrying a girl her as well. if I can find a girl who can move in with me I guess that’s all I want.
Care to elaborate? Very Trump-like comment.
I get the graph… but from a guy’s standpoint… i think the downturn in the number of marriages is driven by the old adage.
“Why buy the cow when you can get the milk from free?”
And the cow takes half your stuff at its will, unless certain measures aren’t put in place before hand.