bromion Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Post your profile so we can give you tips. You > probably wrote the wrong things in your profile if > you are decent looking and are making a decent > income (presumably, with your CFA) but not getting > any responses. Keep in mind also that dating in > general, and online dating specifically, is much, > much harder for men than for women. Sperm is > cheap, eggs are expensive, and women know it. To > consistently pull quality women you need to have > some kind of edge (lots of money, good looks, > fame, or mad game); average is not getting it > done. LOL! Agreed. To give you an idea, I filled out a really quick profile on Match.com just for kicks - no picture, very little information - did it purely for entertainment purposes with friends to compare how many matches we got. In a matter of a day, I had like 5 responses from guys wanting a date. Keep in mind, I had NO picture and did not say anything interesting to warrant any response. I heard my ex-roommate talk about how she signed up for match.com and got crappy responses (she was a total… very unpleasant person with a huge attitude problem with nothing to compensate for it). To give you an idea of the quality of her date, she went out with him, and they decided to go dutch on the bill… She was okay with it until he asked: “So, who’s going to pay for the coke?” L M A O!!! \ She totally deserved it. By the way, is going dutch common? For reals, that does NOT fly in my book. Girlfriend consensus is that if the dude really likes you, he will pay for the date.
Sorry, I forgot to address the poster - What is the age demographic you’re targeting and your preferences? If you’re looking for a woman under 30, the thing that might be going against you is that… you have a kid. Over 30, it doesn’t matter as much (chances are, the woman has a kid too), but under 30, it’s likely that most of the women have never married before and are looking for a similar background. It’s great that you’re a loving father and some women love that, but depending on the age, preferences are different. This is especially true if you picked the same education level. (I’ve met career women that don’t want any children.) Before y’all jump on me, I have met plenty of men that would never give a woman with a child the time of day, especially in their 20’s and 30’s (this changes as people get older). And I think it’s rare for women to message men first unless the man is really good-looking and/or has stellar job & money. This is because, as someone mentioned previously, even if the woman is remotely cute, she will be flooded with responses. If you were a woman and had a CFA (which means college graduate and steady job), you would probably have 100 responses by now.
Lets see the update, we are here to help you. If I was in your town, we’d go out for beers and have some fun. I am the ultimate wingman, prepared to take the hit for the benefit of my pals. Done it time & time & time again. It’s probably easier to get a result when you are trying to help your friend out rather than yourself. And easier to work in a pair. You’d have to get a baby sitter for the night though.
CPierce Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > JOE2010 Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > I have no intention to offend but for some > reason > > I have always thought online dating is for > social > > misfits - if you can not create interactions > from > > friends, family, friends of friends and others, > > may be it is a lifestyle issue? > > > > What do you do when you are not working and > > studying CFA? > > How big is the rock that you live under? You are now being an idiot, it is pretty basic that online dating is riskier. However, it works for some. Good luck to the OP.
If you get responses from women you will see that these women would be really ugly. You should go yourself, look, choose and contact, unless you sign up in sugardaddy and have millions to spare on girls. A normal girl with a normal text and normal photo would get at least 200 responses each day for the first week, and then if she’s not paying for her account she can start a new profile and it will be pushed everywhere again. Go and contact girls, anywhere, online, in the bar, in the street. Try your chances, be smooth and look good. For girls it can become addictive, as they finally have a very busy schedule, a huge waiting list. Which means new people every day, and free dinners and drinks. It can be the way to earn money as well, as it is quite common for guys to offer it on the dating sites when they just get desperate (I know what it is called)
JOE2010 Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > CPierce Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > JOE2010 Wrote: > > > -------------------------------------------------- > > > ----- > > > I have no intention to offend but for some > > reason > > > I have always thought online dating is for > > social > > > misfits - if you can not create interactions > > from > > > friends, family, friends of friends and > others, > > > may be it is a lifestyle issue? > > > > > > What do you do when you are not working and > > > studying CFA? > > > > How big is the rock that you live under? > > > You are now being an idiot, it is pretty basic > that online dating is riskier. However, it works > for some. Good luck to the OP. Riskier how? The last few couples that my wife and I have met (coworkers, friends of other friends, etc) seem to have all met online. In the last year, I have actually met 3 couples that met online and are now married, so it defintely seems to me that online dating can be a very positive experience. And in the case of the OP who already has a child and may find it difficult finding the time to check out the bar scene, I can totally see where online dating would be helpful.
BValGuy Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > JOE2010 Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > CPierce Wrote: > > > -------------------------------------------------- > > > ----- > > > JOE2010 Wrote: > > > > > > -------------------------------------------------- > > > > > > ----- > > > > I have no intention to offend but for some > > > reason > > > > I have always thought online dating is for > > > social > > > > misfits - if you can not create > interactions > > > from > > > > friends, family, friends of friends and > > others, > > > > may be it is a lifestyle issue? > > > > > > > > What do you do when you are not working and > > > > studying CFA? > > > > > > How big is the rock that you live under? > > > > > > You are now being an idiot, it is pretty basic > > that online dating is riskier. However, it > works > > for some. Good luck to the OP. > > > Riskier how? The last few couples that my wife > and I have met (coworkers, friends of other > friends, etc) seem to have all met online. In the > last year, I have actually met 3 couples that met > online and are now married, so it defintely seems > to me that online dating can be a very positive > experience. And in the case of the OP who already > has a child and may find it difficult finding the > time to check out the bar scene, I can totally see > where online dating would be helpful. I mentioned it works for some, if you read my post.
Ocean Mist Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > By the way, is going dutch common? For reals, that > does NOT fly in my book. Girlfriend consensus is > that if the dude really likes you, he will pay for > the date. some girls really want to ‘prove their independence’ by insisting they pay for at least a portion. in those cases i let them leave the tip. some expect for us pay the whole thing. for a first date, that’s quesitonable. by the third, not as much, but leaving the tip is nice.
Go get em tiger.
My rule has always been: on the first dates, the woman should offer to pay her part, and the man should refuse. However, at some point, the woman has to demonstrate that she’s not just milking him for free stuff. So she needs to make him dinner some time, take him to dessert or coffee or the theatre… Not necessarily on the first date (although dessert is a cheap way to demonstrate goodwill), but fairly early on.
^Nice way of putting it! I, however, find deep respect for man that always wants to pay. This means that he will not be petty with money. One of women’s pet peeves are really stingy men that keep a tally of who pays for what. I mean, I’m the type of person that will pay for people without caring much in moderate amounts. The dating scene is different in how it’s not so much the money factor, but more about pettiness. I guess my expectations are somewhat more extreme because I value generosity as a high virtue to strive for. And yes, I would offer to pay in all instances (for the full bill), but like most women, this is a “test.” LOL! Here are the following pass/ fall scenarios: Scenario 1: Dude - OKAY, you pay! Outcome: Fail Scenario 2: Dude - No, I will pay. Girl - Okay, but let me get dessert / coffee Subsect A: Dude - Okay Outcome: 50/50 Fail Subsect B: Dude - No, I got you this time but maybe next time Outcome: Pass if dude is still insistent on paying but woman pays Scenario 3: Dude - No, I will pay. Girl - Okay, but let me get dessert / coffee Dude - Thank you for the offer, but I believe the man should always pay. Girl - Oh, you are so studly! Outcome - PASS!!!
bchadwick Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > My rule has always been: on the first dates, the > woman should offer to pay her part, and the man > should refuse. However, at some point, the woman > has to demonstrate that she’s not just milking him > for free stuff. So she needs to make him dinner > some time, take him to dessert or coffee or the > theatre… Not necessarily on the first date > (although dessert is a cheap way to demonstrate > goodwill), but fairly early on. I definitely agree with this. I think people in relationships should also consider occupation and professional status…what do you guys think? This is an important question for me and I need AnalystForum’s collective wisdom here. I wonder if I can start getting my girlfriend to take me out to nice dinners and vacations. After all, I’m going to be just a humble student for the next two years looking for a job. Numi for hire…
My current GF makes more than I do but I always insist on paying. Granted she’s 6 years older.
ASSet_MANagement Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > My current GF makes more than I do but I always > insist on paying. > > Granted she’s 6 years older. ^GF? Already?
i’m all for paying, but not until she deserves it. there are too many women out there that try to milk guys for stuff. if a date isn’t going well, its a 50/50 split - like a mutual breakup. if a date is going well, i get bill and she does tip. if a date is going very well, i take the whole thing in stride. professions only matter if you both have one
Yes, I think the financial status of each person should be considered in determining who should pay. I also should have clarified that I think the man should always pay especially in the beginning of the relationship, all things equal (including financial status). After that and marriage, the dynamics change and both pay. Perhaps I have been spoiled. But perhaps not because I know a lot of women that never pay. Re: mar350’s post: EXACTLY. If the dude really likes the girl, he will pay for the whole thing. Women know this.
Numi- If you’re in a long-term relationship, I think that occupation and professional status should definitely be a factor. My g/f is now in law school and has very, very, very little money to spare. Hence, I’m paying for more than my share of our evenings out, etc. If she graduates from law school and for some reason I was unemployed, I know she’d do the reverse. However, I don’t know if we’re the norm. We’ve been dating for about 5 yrs and have very similar saving/spending habits. -SSF
Guys pay until it is a ltr. After that the girls chip in and help out (pay for tips / dessert etc) but guys still pay for more.
daviskr Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > ASSet_MANagement Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > My current GF makes more than I do but I always > > insist on paying. > > > > Granted she’s 6 years older. > > ^GF? Already? Yeah kind of…
ASSet_MANagement Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > daviskr Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > ASSet_MANagement Wrote: > > > -------------------------------------------------- > > > ----- > > > My current GF makes more than I do but I > always > > > insist on paying. > > > > > > Granted she’s 6 years older. > > > > ^GF? Already? > > > Yeah kind of… Is she worthy enough to bring out when Doug and I come visit?