Akanska!!! It’s good to have you around!
Somehow i get the impression that you are not the kind of girl who would find the right kind of guy on the internet. I think you will be much better off letting things develop naturally rather than finding the one via ‘profile matching’ services.
On the subject of male insecurity and the provider mindset being ingrained in our DNA…what do women think about that…do they think it is a non issue in the 21st century,do they find it pathetic for a man to be less able to navigate the world than a lady, or do they take it as a given that the majority of men would feel ill at ease admitting being unsuccessful in a male world?
Online dating suffers from the same problem a lot of others things in life do. People want what they want (and often think they deserve it), but don’t bother to spend a lot of time thinking about what they bring to the table.
If you’re an intelligent, fit, at least reasonably attractive / successful man or woman, you’re already in the 90th % for your gender and shouldn’t have difficulty getting a date with someone attractive, assuming you don’t have a major personality defect. If you’re not close to the best version of yourself that you can be, either lower your standards or improve yourself. I really wish people would spend more time focusing on improving themselves instead of criticising others so much.
This isn’t directed at anyone specific in the thread, just a general observation.
god i’m glad i met my wife in junior high. dating in your adult life is fucking brutal.
seems to me that making a checklist of what you want beforehand (even if it’s a short list consciously) is counter productive. you end up brushing people aside before you actually get to know them. you won’t know if you could be in love with someone for the rest of your life until you know them really well.
my 2c - be open to people whose company you find yourself enjoying, even if they don’t have everything on the list. if you get to a serious stage with them, you’ll find that wanting to be with them for the long haul is a choice of valuing the good over the negative in a person. nobody is perfect, not even my smoking hot wife who went to a top school and can cook the shit out of a meatloaf. good luck.
yay almost 2000 AF points…too bad can’t redeem AF points outside US
is her name Ayn Fergeson?
I approve of this comment.
Not sure if online dating is the way to go if you fancy yourself to be an elite person. Preppy successful people tend to hang out with people of similar backgrounds. So, the group is already self selected.
…so whats the consensus on random chick asking guy out? Desperate?
this is fun …more background: I’ve never actually “dated” outside of school. I’ve been off the market for a very long time so its all new and somewhat frightening to me. I also hate the typical dallas bar scene- where you pick is 1.) young SMU douchebaggery and 2.) sleezy old men and pro’s.
I guess I need to find better places/ develope a new single social circle.
^ I second the new social circle, that can be really good. I feel one of the problems is when you move out of school, your social circle just dramatically shrinks as everyone goes off in a different direction.
Only if you’re not attractive to him. Does he flirt back when you flirt with him? If not then you’re screwed.
I went to Dallas once. Thought the girls were pretty and tall. Had a great time. Way too many strip malls and chain restaurants to stay skinny there.
Met my soon-to-be wife in 4th year undergrad.
Don’t know anyone who has had a long-term relationship that led to anything serious with someone they met in a bar/club.
Maybe take up a team sport, or activity and meet someone there with similar interests.
Most of the weddings I’ve been to have been for people who met through friends, church, activity, school, etc. Based on this small sample, either bar relationships don’t last long or the frequency of bar hookups is overstated. Or maybe my friends are all nerds and don’t go out.
Since bromion is supposed to give a best man speech, I wonder how it would go if the couple was a bar hookup. “I was in a bar with Joe and we saw this wasted chick across the room. Joe was like ‘I am going to tap that ass’… and then never got around to dumping her after that.”
KanKan. I dunno which guys you typically encounter, but personally I can’t stand women who aren’t independent. Nothing turns me off faster than a woman who wants to be treated like a little princess; I’m not your dad and it’s almost 2013 now. This is probably why I tend to date women who are 2-5years older than me.
You can possibly find what you’re looking for online, but as others have tirelessly said on this site, online dating is just another card in the deck on top of other networking vehicles (events, friends, going out, etc…).
BSwan, lol. Damn pet pictures are so annoying. Oddly enough, though not suprising, most girls say they hate it when dudes have a photo with their shirt off, but there was some study done that claimed guys with a photo bearing their manchest/abs do a lot better than those that don’t… again perputating the claim that women say one thing and really mean another (sorry too easy).
ironically she’s a bleeding heart liberal in many respects.
how can you guys be sure its even a girl?..
Ok, just saying that you mention the fact that you are successful, pretty and smart before saying anything else about yourself. Show, don’t tell.
Okay, how do you definte the “best you”?
Never Happened.
thats nice
I don’t think we can be very helpful here unless you post pics.