So today is my anniversary. My fifth anniversary. I think that means I’m supposed to give her some wood.

Any suggestions?

Ummm…this one kinda writes itself, doesn’t it?

It’s the only time in the year where he gets laid. That’s why I don’t get married.

Is it customary in Texas to present your spouse with timber on special occassions? Please explain.

Is there a specific type of timber? I bet she would like Pine.

I like oak


Green - David Yurman was my go to during my relationship anni so 5 year marriage with a BSD like youself probably means you owe your better half a benz. Perhaps you’ll get some road head from it.

you’ve been waiting to tell that joke for 5 years haven’t you?

Yes. Though the “modern” tradition call for silverware for the 5th. Wait until you get to the 10th. Used to be “tin” but now it’s diamonds. That escaladed quickly.

Mrs. Greenie popped out a kid a few weeks back, so I think he missed his chance this year.


Srs dude… wood. Ideas: And i’m starting to give srs ideas coz i need the upvotes

  1. Carved wooden photo frame and put a picture of you two in it.

  2. Wooden box with your names on it and put your bible (or gun) in it and give it to her.

  3. Some wood chip and cook up a sick grill with meat (post pics)

  4. A wood falis

  5. A chopping board… give it to her and tell her to get in the kitchen and cook something tasty (send pics)

  6. A wooden pipe (you didn’t say if she smoked a pipe or not).

the end

this year it’s the ol’ braciiole eh greenie!

OOOOOoohh I just realised this is a vintage thread… from like 2013… Damnm you got a ten yr anni … damn. Congrats dude

wow i was a tool and none of you consulted me … Mabye i’ll read this in 5 years and think the same thing.