It was funny before you asked what DL is 
You killed the joke man
comp_sci_kid Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > It was funny before you asked what DL is You > killed the joke man no he didn’t, it became asphyxiated because it didn’t remember the saftey word…stupid joke
ASSet_MANagement Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Dated a girl in college and we pretty much > couldn’t keep our hands off each other. > > We “you knowed” ALL the time. > > The flip side was that we had EPIC fights. > > Shed give me a hummer in the bathroom during > parties, in the laundry room, we "you knowed"in > the middle of the soccer field, tennis court and > baseball field. In my car, on her dock, in the > middle of the day…with boats going by. Her > parents bathroom. On her boat. With one of her > girlfriends sleeping in the same bed… > > Yeah it was a little nuts, she would also go south > anytime. > > We also fought…A LOT. We fought because I had > hooked up with her big sister in the sorority > (before I hooked up w/ her). She would throw her > phone at me, I destroyed my phone because of her. > My room in the frat house had holes in the wall > from me punching the wall. I destroyed potted > plants, sprinklers, signs, anything. > > The crowinging moment was this; > > We has a Susan G. Komen walk for the cure or > whatever and her sorority had decided to have a > pie me in the face auction. Basically all the > girls in the school bid on pieing me in the face > (i had at that point developed a pretty good > reputation on campus as being…fun). The pot got > up to about 300 and then the ex put in 320 and won > the auction. She got the pie and did her thing. So > here I am with about 500 kids laughing their a$s > off because she pied the player. So as she is > turning around (i came perpared) I called her > name, she turned around I and tossed a red thong > of hers that she forgot in my bed in her face. > > The look on her current BF’s face was priceless, > the look on her sororities face, priceless, the > look on half of the schools face when they saw > what just went down, glorious. > > > > > > I ended up “you knowing” her later that night. That’s pretty damn funny but - you kept her thong? Are you one of those underwear collectors?
packattack4 Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > > > That’s pretty damn funny but - you kept her thong? > Are you one of those underwear collectors? Nah, I found it underneath my bed. I had a big brown bag FULL of stuff girls have left in my bed/room. Handcuffs, Masks, wigs, shoes, underwear, bras, shorts, a rotary telephone… I willed it down to one of the younger brothers when I left to keep growing the bag. I found her underwear and threw it in the bag, when I found out the Tri Delts were using me as a fundraising target I knew Katie would put down the most to get me pied. So I came with the underwear in myback pocket.
I’ll post up a picture of her when I get home tonight. She was pretty cute, too bad she got a lil chubby now.
ASSet_MANagement Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > packattack4 Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > > > > > That’s pretty damn funny but - you kept her > thong? > > Are you one of those underwear collectors? > > > > Nah, I found it underneath my bed. I had a big > brown bag FULL of stuff girls have left in my > bed/room. Handcuffs, Masks, wigs, shoes, > underwear, bras, shorts, a rotary telephone… I > willed it down to one of the younger brothers when > I left to keep growing the bag. > > I found her underwear and threw it in the bag, > when I found out the Tri Delts were using me as a > fundraising target I knew Katie would put down the > most to get me pied. So I came with the underwear > in myback pocket. Rotary telephone? Interesting…actually no I don’t even want to know what that was used for.
Her http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-sf2p/v17/45/23/18002641/n18002641_30239892_7402.jpg Me playing “doctor” during the Halloween party http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/photos-ak-ash1/v50/121/114/18003543/n18003543_30267607_9868.jpg
Fk man, well done. I’ve had a couple of crazies but kicked-down-the-front-door-of-my-house-screaming girl and stalked-me-for-a-year girl don’t compare with the good stories here.
Mr. Pink Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > kicked-down-the-front-door-of-my-house-screaming > girl and stalked-me-for-a-year girl Details, we need them
I think the most awkward was the brazilian girl who called me up and said she was planning to come up and visit me during Carnaval. I mean, the time we had together was fun, but it was just two tourists having fun on the beach in Fortaleza. But apparently I made an impression that was good enough to warrant intercontinental plane tickets for a rerun. And especially awkward when I already had someone (also brazilian) coming up to stay with me during that time. Fortunately, the first woman was able to cancel the tickets. No, wait, craziest was it was the married woman who got drunk, sat down straddling me (in a nice tight little black dress) and said that I really really turned her on. Normally, that is a good thing (well, aside from the married part); what was awkward was that her husband was sitting across the room looking at us as she did it… and was not pleased. I forget if she kissed me. Or was it the woman that couldn’t take no for an answer and called every 10 minutes until I answered the phone to ask when we were getting together again. Or maybe the woman who would show up at the door at 2am unannounced for a booty call, even though I had split up with her and was seeing someone else. I think she definitely enjoyed the fun of watching me try to explain who she is. Or the woman who screamed so loud when she came that I damn near had a heart attack the first time. I was looking around wondering where the pool of blood must be. I think my life would have had a lot more intimate fun if I weren’t scared of what the women do *after* you get involved with them. On the other hand, when the woman is the right woman, it’s absolutely totally awesome!
Cant sleep eh? Me neither. My gf was feeling really horny tonight. Now I cant go back to sleep and am wondering how I will wake up for work.
bchadwick Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I think the most awkward was the brazilian girl > who called me up and said she was planning to come > up and visit me during Carnaval. I mean, the time > we had together was fun, but it was just two > tourists having fun on the beach in Fortaleza. > But apparently I made an impression that was good > enough to warrant intercontinental plane tickets > for a rerun. > > And especially awkward when I already had someone > (also brazilian) coming up to stay with me during > that time. Fortunately, the first woman was able > to cancel the tickets. > > > No, wait, craziest was it was the married woman > who got drunk, sat down straddling me (in a nice > tight little black dress) and said that I really > really turned her on. Normally, that is a good > thing (well, aside from the married part); what > was awkward was that her husband was sitting > across the room looking at us as she did it… and > was not pleased. I forget if she kissed me. > > > Or was it the woman that couldn’t take no for an > answer and called every 10 minutes until I > answered the phone to ask when we were getting > together again. > > > Or maybe the woman who would show up at the door > at 2am unannounced for a booty call, even though I > had split up with her and was seeing someone else. > I think she definitely enjoyed the fun of > watching me try to explain who she is. > > > Or the woman who screamed so loud when she came > that I damn near had a heart attack the first > time. I was looking around wondering where the > pool of blood must be. > > > > I think my life would have had a lot more intimate > fun if I weren’t scared of what the women do > *after* you get involved with them. On the other > hand, when the woman is the right woman, it’s > absolutely totally awesome! These all have long and excellent underlying stories I feel like.
I’ve met some crazy guys as well. 1) Once I met a guy who seemed to be perfect. He was good looking, really funny, loved fashion and shopping, had a successful career and was ready to commit to a serious relationship. He seemed like every girl’s dream and he wasn’t gay either. I wondered why he was still single. Then I found out. After a few dates, he told me what he liked in bed. After that, I knew why he couldn’t sustain a relationship for longer than 2 weeks. I am very open and love to experiment, but his fetish was just too much for me. I don’t want to go into details here, cos I don’t want to get banned from the forum, but trust me, it was majorly freaky. 2) Another weird guy I dated invited me round to his house for dinner. He had to finish cooking, so I waited in the living room. I stood there and looked around. When I looked at the bookshelf, I suddenly noticed 5 or 6 books about mother and son relationships with really freaky titles like “Mum, the only woman in my life”, “A mother’s claws”, “Mother, please let go of me”, “Mothers and sons: How to replace the love of your life”, “How to find a woman that’s like your mother”…my only thought was, “I’m outta here.” Seriously, if you do happen to own books like that, then at least don’t keep them on your living room bookshelf. 3) In my student days, In once met a guy who told me that he wasn’t good in bed. Needless to say, his self-consciuosness turn me off ever verifying that statement. 4) I once went out with a guy who insisted on licking my armpits (after I’d been out all night and was still wearing deodorant…yuk)…I never answered his calls.
Dumped a mad chinese chick at uni who was besotted - wanted to buy me tickets to HK after my MA. Next day I got home and she was having dinner. With my parents.
Muddahudda Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Dumped a mad chinese chick at uni who was besotted > - wanted to buy me tickets to HK after my MA. > > Next day I got home and she was having dinner. > > With my parents. Nice…
ASSet_MANagement Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Muddahudda Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > Dumped a mad chinese chick at uni who was > besotted > > - wanted to buy me tickets to HK after my MA. > > > > Next day I got home and she was having dinner. > > > > With my parents. > Damn, I hate people who try to hijack your life after the first date…
“A Mother’s Claws”?! Niiiiiiiiice.
WOW!!! great thread.
Lara-Lilly Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I’ve met some crazy guys as well. > > 1) Once I met a guy who seemed to be perfect. He > was good looking, really funny, loved fashion and > shopping, had a successful career and was ready to > commit to a serious relationship. He seemed like > every girl’s dream and he wasn’t gay either. I > wondered why he was still single. > > Then I found out. After a few dates, he told me > what he liked in bed. After that, I knew why he > couldn’t sustain a relationship for longer than 2 > weeks. I am very open and love to experiment, but > his fetish was just too much for me. I don’t want > to go into details here, cos I don’t want to get > banned from the forum, but trust me, it was > majorly freaky. > > 2) Another weird guy I dated invited me round to > his house for dinner. He had to finish cooking, so > I waited in the living room. I stood there and > looked around. When I looked at the bookshelf, I > suddenly noticed 5 or 6 books about mother and son > relationships with really freaky titles like “Mum, > the only woman in my life”, “A mother’s claws”, > “Mother, please let go of me”, “Mothers and sons: > How to replace the love of your life”, “How to > find a woman that’s like your mother”…my only > thought was, “I’m outta here.” > > Seriously, if you do happen to own books like > that, then at least don’t keep them on your living > room bookshelf. > > 3) In my student days, In once met a guy who told > me that he wasn’t good in bed. Needless to say, > his self-consciuosness turn me off ever verifying > that statement. > > 4) I once went out with a guy who insisted on > licking my armpits (after I’d been out all night > and was still wearing deodorant…yuk)…I never > answered his calls. Lara wearing a pink bunny suit and ballet shoes with a city sombrero while doing the dew isnt a fetish lara
Lara-Lilly Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > I’ve met some crazy guys as well. > > 1) Once I met a guy who seemed to be perfect. He > was good looking, really funny, loved fashion and > shopping, had a successful career and was ready to > commit to a serious relationship. He seemed like > every girl’s dream and he wasn’t gay either. I > wondered why he was still single. > > Then I found out. After a few dates, he told me > what he liked in bed. After that, I knew why he > couldn’t sustain a relationship for longer than 2 > weeks. I am very open and love to experiment, but > his fetish was just too much for me. I don’t want > to go into details here, cos I don’t want to get > banned from the forum, but trust me, it was > majorly freaky. > > 2) Another weird guy I dated invited me round to > his house for dinner. He had to finish cooking, so > I waited in the living room. I stood there and > looked around. When I looked at the bookshelf, I > suddenly noticed 5 or 6 books about mother and son > relationships with really freaky titles like “Mum, > the only woman in my life”, “A mother’s claws”, > “Mother, please let go of me”, “Mothers and sons: > How to replace the love of your life”, “How to > find a woman that’s like your mother”…my only > thought was, “I’m outta here.” > > Seriously, if you do happen to own books like > that, then at least don’t keep them on your living > room bookshelf. > > 3) In my student days, In once met a guy who told > me that he wasn’t good in bed. Needless to say, > his self-consciuosness turn me off ever verifying > that statement. > > 4) I once went out with a guy who insisted on > licking my armpits (after I’d been out all night > and was still wearing deodorant…yuk)…I never > answered his calls. Lara-lilly don’t be a tease, what was this freaks MO? This is the back office, that type of stuff is expected and encouraged! I’m going to guess: He liked ball-gags in multiple orrifaces (is that how you spell that naughty word? Probably not even close).