Can someone explain why it is such a big deal? I can understand big milestones, 16 18 or 21, 30. But on the actual day? the person did nothing for it, it was beyond their control anyway, and was just the result of 2 people who got together and did their business.
Hmm, girls crave needless attention… You may be on to something here, wonder if anyone else has come across this?
iteracom Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Can someone explain why it is such a big deal? I > can understand big milestones, 16 18 or 21, 30. > > But on the actual day? the person did nothing for > it, it was beyond their control anyway, and was > just the result of 2 people who got together and > did their business. Very easy to explain… you forget… you’re done. Especially if she’s just a girlfriend (as opposed to a wife or mother of your children) your job is to make her feel special and feel good about herself, and if you forget, you’ve failed.
^ That doesn’t explain why. All you said was to remember it, and make it special. so? how does that explain why it requires this demand/that demand/I’m-queen-for-a-day attitude?
iteracom Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Can someone explain why it is such a big deal? I > can understand big milestones, 16 18 or 21, 30. > > But on the actual day? the person did nothing for > it, it was beyond their control anyway, and was > just the result of 2 people who got together and > did their business. I think this is just girls being girls – something about wanting (needing?) attention most of the time. It’s like a foreign language for men, unless you’re Perez Hilton.
those used to be two of my fav things, but now i’m closing in on 30… Black Swan Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Hmm, girls crave needless attention… bingo
bchadwick Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > iteracom Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > Can someone explain why it is such a big deal? > I > > can understand big milestones, 16 18 or 21, 30. > > > > > But on the actual day? the person did nothing > for > > it, it was beyond their control anyway, and was > > just the result of 2 people who got together > and > > did their business. > > > > Very easy to explain… you forget… you’re > done. > > > Especially if she’s just a girlfriend (as opposed > to a wife or mother of your children) your job is > to make her feel special and feel good about > herself, and if you forget, you’ve failed. as Chris Rocks once said 'every morning you wake up go to the mirror and say F your life F your dream F your happiness F your free time good now lets go make this b1tch happy
WOMEN BE SHOPPIN
bchadwick Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > iteracom Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > Can someone explain why it is such a big deal? > I > > can understand big milestones, 16 18 or 21, 30. > > > > > But on the actual day? the person did nothing > for > > it, it was beyond their control anyway, and was > > just the result of 2 people who got together > and > > did their business. > > > > Very easy to explain… you forget… you’re > done. > > > Especially if she’s just a girlfriend (as opposed > to a wife or mother of your children) your job is > to make her feel special and feel good about > herself, and if you forget, you’ve failed. Sometimes things are simple enough that you just need to know the rule. “Why” almost doesn’t matter. Women get hit on constantly, especially if they are remotely attractive. They have choices, but only a certain amount of time to spend with a guy. So, they want a guy that makes them feel valued and important. Is that so hard to understand, really? Even us guys want to feel special and important… it’s just that for us guys, having a woman want to get jiggy with us is a pretty reliable way for her to show that she likes us. She can forget our birthdays, but if she shows up in the right lingerie, heels, and brings beer, all is good again. And that’s because, for most of us guys, we don’t get hit on constantly, and even when we do get hit on, it’s not at all guaranteed that it’s going to turn into something jiggy. It’s different for women. For most women, they just have to “not say no” for something sexy to happen, so that’s not what makes them feel special. You want to seduce them? Great, there are tons of other guys, sober or drunk, that want to do that too. It’s not really that special. What is special is when she knows that you took some time out of your day to think about her. Her, and not that chick that just walked past you in the tight dress. That’s what makes her feel that she’s important to you. Going out and making a fuss about her is another way to do that. Taking her to a chic flick when she knows that you don’t really like them lets her know that her happiness is important to you, and that’s what she likes. And *that’s* what’s hard for her to find. It doesn’t mean that she doesn’t enjoy getting physical with you, just as with guys it doesn’t mean that we don’t like it when she cooks us a nice dinner. It just means that knowing that you’re thinking about her when she’s not around, and planning to make her happy (assuming she’s already decided she likes you) is the thing that tells her she’s not wasting her time with you. And if you didn’t think about her on her birthday (or plan for it), then she pretty much knows that she’s wasting her time on someone who doesn’t really prioritize her happiness. And worse… if you forget… all her girlfriends will ask her what you did for her on your birthday… so now, not only have you made her feel like she’s not important… you’ve embarrassed her in front of her girlfriends…
iteracom Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > ^ That doesn’t explain why. All you said was to > remember it, and make it special. so? > > how does that explain why it requires this > demand/that demand/I’m-queen-for-a-day attitude? Dude, its chick logic… you can’t explain it
I think bchad is a girl. we have been deceived all this time.
Well, if girls could have it their way, every day would be special their special day. However, since they intellectually understand that this is not practical, they bottle up their need to feel special. Then, they unleash everything on certain days in the year: birthdays, Valentine’s day, anniversaries, and other special occasions.
ohai Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Well, if girls could have it their way, every day > would be special their special day. However, since > they intellectually understand that this is not > practical, they bottle up their need to feel > special. Then, they unleash everything on certain > days in the year: birthdays, Valentine’s day, > anniversaries, and other special occasions. Lol. Very true. But don’t forget… you have to throw in those random “special” days for no reason.
ATM is the gift that keeps on giving
bchadwick Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > bchadwick Wrote: > -------------------------------------------------- > ----- > > iteracom Wrote: > > > -------------------------------------------------- > > > ----- > > > Can someone explain why it is such a big > deal? > > I > > > can understand big milestones, 16 18 or 21, > 30. > > > > > > > > But on the actual day? the person did nothing > > for > > > it, it was beyond their control anyway, and > was > > > just the result of 2 people who got together > > and > > > did their business. > > > > > > > > Very easy to explain… you forget… you’re > > done. > > > > > > Especially if she’s just a girlfriend (as > opposed > > to a wife or mother of your children) your job > is > > to make her feel special and feel good about > > herself, and if you forget, you’ve failed. > > > Sometimes things are simple enough that you just > need to know the rule. “Why” almost doesn’t > matter. > > Women get hit on constantly, especially if they > are remotely attractive. They have choices, but > only a certain amount of time to spend with a guy. > So, they want a guy that makes them feel valued > and important. Is that so hard to understand, > really? > > Even us guys want to feel special and important… > it’s just that for us guys, having a woman want to > get jiggy with us is a pretty reliable way for her > to show that she likes us. She can forget our > birthdays, but if she shows up in the right > lingerie, heels, and brings beer, all is good > again. And that’s because, for most of us guys, > we don’t get hit on constantly, and even when we > do get hit on, it’s not at all guaranteed that > it’s going to turn into something jiggy. > > It’s different for women. For most women, they > just have to “not say no” for something sexy to > happen, so that’s not what makes them feel > special. You want to seduce them? Great, there > are tons of other guys, sober or drunk, that want > to do that too. It’s not really that special. > > What is special is when she knows that you took > some time out of your day to think about her. > Her, and not that chick that just walked past you > in the tight dress. That’s what makes her feel > that she’s important to you. Going out and making > a fuss about her is another way to do that. > Taking her to a chic flick when she knows that you > don’t really like them lets her know that her > happiness is important to you, and that’s what she > likes. And *that’s* what’s hard for her to find. > > It doesn’t mean that she doesn’t enjoy getting > physical with you, just as with guys it doesn’t > mean that we don’t like it when she cooks us a > nice dinner. It just means that knowing that > you’re thinking about her when she’s not around, > and planning to make her happy (assuming she’s > already decided she likes you) is the thing that > tells her she’s not wasting her time with you. > > And if you didn’t think about her on her birthday > (or plan for it), then she pretty much knows that > she’s wasting her time on someone who doesn’t > really prioritize her happiness. > > And worse… if you forget… all her girlfriends > will ask her what you did for her on your > birthday… so now, not only have you made her > feel like she’s not important… you’ve > embarrassed her in front of her girlfriends… Bravo! Bravo! forget all the other loosers on this thread… My birthday is very fucking special and my man knows this for sure. it’s very special because it is my birthday (see?).
ATM might be dangerous depending on where you live; in Asia for example, I avoid ATM.
I still don’t agree. I’ll break it down for you bchadwick Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > > > Sometimes things are simple enough that you just > need to know the rule. “Why” almost doesn’t > matter. > > Women get hit on constantly, especially if they > are remotely attractive. They have choices, but > only a certain amount of time to spend with a guy. > So, they want a guy that makes them feel valued > and important. Is that so hard to understand, > really? > Wanting to be with someone isn’t a one-way street. You are suggesting girls don’t take any initiative with something they want, and just choose between handouts. That’s actually sad. The guys who are really good make the girls want them. That is the real power in keeping the one you want without becoming whipped and unhappy. At the end of the day, her looks will fade, her physical attractiveness will drastically decline, so you want the whole package as a keeper. Those girls are rare. > Even us guys want to feel special and important… > it’s just that for us guys, having a woman want to > get jiggy with us is a pretty reliable way for her > to show that she likes us. She can forget our > birthdays, but if she shows up in the right > lingerie, heels, and brings beer, all is good > again. And that’s because, for most of us guys, > we don’t get hit on constantly, and even when we > do get hit on, it’s not at all guaranteed that > it’s going to turn into something jiggy. > Now you’re saying all guys are shallow and just want to get it on. Apparently you also lumped yourself in with the group that doesn’t get traction with girls. If getting it on is all that matters, that doesn’t last, and winding up old and alone doesn’t sound awesome. > It’s different for women. For most women, they > just have to “not say no” for something sexy to > happen, so that’s not what makes them feel > special. You want to seduce them? Great, there > are tons of other guys, sober or drunk, that want > to do that too. It’s not really that special. > You keep going back to just getting it on. Are you 16? > What is special is when she knows that you took > some time out of your day to think about her. > Her, and not that chick that just walked past you > in the tight dress. That’s what makes her feel > that she’s important to you. Going out and making > a fuss about her is another way to do that. > Taking her to a chic flick when she knows that you > don’t really like them lets her know that her > happiness is important to you, and that’s what she > likes. And *that’s* what’s hard for her to find. > This I actually agree with. But it goes back to my point, letting her know she’s important, and that you “took time to think about her” does not require a “queen of the day” attitude. It really doesn’t. Any guy can do this on a regular basis. In fact, the regular gestures that show affection are far more telling of a great guy then a one day big spending on gifts-dinner extravaganza. > It doesn’t mean that she doesn’t enjoy getting > physical with you, just as with guys it doesn’t > mean that we don’t like it when she cooks us a > nice dinner. It just means that knowing that > you’re thinking about her when she’s not around, > and planning to make her happy (assuming she’s > already decided she likes you) is the thing that > tells her she’s not wasting her time with you. > again, “thinking about” & “planning” does not require this-demand and that-demand on one day. > And if you didn’t think about her on her birthday > (or plan for it), then she pretty much knows that > she’s wasting her time on someone who doesn’t > really prioritize her happiness. > You never explained why it’s so significant. You’re just going back now. A gesture of doing something nice and remembering is thinking about it. > And worse… if you forget… all her girlfriends > will ask her what you did for her on your > birthday… so now, not only have you made her > feel like she’s not important… you’ve > embarrassed her in front of her girlfriends… If life was all about showing off to others, that’s a very sad life. work hard, and enjoy the rewards sure, but a life spent chasing the need to feel important or desired by others will not bring you any self happiness. Living like this can’t create self-fulfillment. it will feel empty. I’m not talking about doing nothing and not-remembering the bday. I’m talking about keeping it in reason and not going over-board.
Penny-wenny Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > > > Bravo! Bravo! forget all the other loosers on this > thread… > > My birthday is very fucking special and my man > knows this for sure. it’s very special because it > is my birthday (see?). Yea I knew we had one on this board. Take notice gentlemen. Find the real keepers (looks and reason), you’ll be far happier in the long run.
Funny this convo because I haven’t been with girls that are particularly bothered about their bdays. Maybe it’s because I treat em right all year round. Or maybe cos I avoid the overly self-centred type. Who knows.
Some people are needy others are not. Don’t think there is a one size fits all formula.