Lol ohai how can we fail you?
“Not because it was shark week”…lololo!. silly 
Did she also use any of the terms above??? 
In all seriousness, if you haven’t introduced some toys you should consider it. You can start small and work your way up to more advanced stimuli. I’d recommend driving some Hot Wheels cars up and down her back. It feels nice.
^ Great idea for a Christmas gift.
Make sure you open it when the entire family is present.
I think the desire or lack comes first, excuses second. I wouldn’t read too much into it. Lack of desire all the time seems like an issue though
Difficult to say whether that video is the stupidest I’ve ever seen. I think it just dethroned Bubble Butt.
What a shame!
Greenie, serious question. Do you eat the ham sandwich? This is always a good way in. Get down there and get to work and don’t stop until your tongue feels so sore that you’ll never be able to talk again… and then keep going a bit longer. Consider it your Everest.
Look at all the suggestions as if every married man hasnt been turned down one way or another haha. I guess a bunch of gurus.
In all seriousness - Greenie have you tried to tie your piece to a giant rock and pull the boulder?
oh my to be caught between a rock a hard place!
A completely unnecessary tawdry physical gesture, as any non-virgin knows. I satisfy my wife every day with nothing more than a salacious song and she never says “no”
Brah, you married?
^yessir
GMAN,
Please update us on status
Very Tank
It seems he’s narrowed the problem down to his iPhone.
https://www.reddit.com/r/DeadBedrooms/comments/csl9ki/he_says_i_think_we_should_try_to_be_intimate/ Greenman’s chick posted on reddit … damn… so harsh "
I (34, F) don’t want my husband (44, M) to TRY to be intimate with me after I tell him I want out of our marriage. I wanted him to try three years ago. I don’t want to force him to want to be with me. I don’t want to emotionally blackmail him into wanting intimacy. Does he really think it would be enjoyable for me to let him do things to me knowing he doesn’t want to?
I tell him I am unhappy and I want a divorce and he thinks that saying “I think we should try to be intimate tonight” is going to fix it. We haven’t had sex in three years and now he wants to try things.
He didn’t try when I cried and begged him to go to counseling. He didn’t try when I asked him to read the sex starved marriage. He didn’t try when I told him I didn’t know how much longer I could live with a distant and cold husband. He decides to try now that I’m ready to leave.
My response was “how about you go fuck yourself? Is that intimate enough?”
Lol! Necrophilia. Don’t forget to put some Valium into her cup of coffee before falling asleep. Just in case she wouldn’t wake up too early.