How much do you guys pony up for Christmas gifts for the person your dating (and how long have you been dating)?
I’ve conveniently managed to be broken up each of the past couple Christmases and I’m thinking I may have gone overboard. I’ve been dating this one girl for just under a year and knew her since I was in middle school, so it’s not a fling, but I just picked up a MacBook Air, but now I’m starting to wonder if that was too much and it’s going to look weird?
Well…where do you see it going? I’m thinking the Macbook is too expensive
In true AF fashion:
Yeah, it sounds like too much. Problem is you’re setting the bar too high. An iPad mini would do the trick.
Gift giving stopped somewhere around year five of marriage. Now we’ll buy something for each other every now and then, especially when we know there’s something the other really wants, but that’s about it. Sometimes it’s something small and other times I may surprise my wife with a trip (rarely).
Now, before we were married I’d spend some money on her. I didn’t really have an amount in mind. Your SO will appreciate something you put some thought into more than something expensive. Throughout the year, make mental notes of the things she mentions she’d like. By the time xmas rolls around you should have a good list of items to choose from you know she’ll like. And, it shows you were listening to her…which I guess women appreciate.
Or just buy diamonds.
I’m also a fan of setting the bar low. It is very difficult over time to maintain the level of passion / intensity that is present in a lot of relationships in the early courtship stage. The wise man knows this and leaves himself plenty of room for error down the road.
Electronics don’t last long, and they don’t make women freak out like more traditional gifts. Trust me - it depends on gender, but for women, $1000 on diamonds is a better investment than $1000 in computer equipment. Doesn’t have to be diamonds and jewelry, of course - just something that is tastefully chosen.
I think… the absolute cost is not the only measure. It depends on the gift. $1000 on necklace and earrings is not weird. However $1000 on… I don’t know, curtains or something, is weird.
Once you are married and live in a “community property” state, wife doesn’t want expensive presents so much. She realizes that I would be spending “her money”. I will probably still get her something for maintenance though.
As much as you can comfortably fit in a brown paper bag, light on fire, and toss out the window on FDR while doing a buck ten.
dunno what willis is takin about but sounds legit
I’d say Mac Air is overboard. I’d drop a few hundred bucks… after all, you give her the gift of being BlackSwan’s S.O. the other 364 days of the year (smiles in the gayest way possible)
First year, just give her jewelry. Nothing over $500 or so, something classic and well made.
Biggest gift I gave my long term GF was a $300 piece of jewelry. For our last year together I gave her her independence back and broke up with her. That gift would up paying me back big time.
LOL at the responses. I actually agree with you guys, but part of this is because she’s finishing up a nurse anesthesia program and money’s pretty tight for her family and I’ve watched her battle with her 1980’s looking brick of a non-functioning laptop and get stressed out about it for the past year and I just can’t take it any more.
As a rule of thumb though, I agree with everything you guys are saying. Especially MBAvCFA. But only this one time.
I strictly limit gifts to wifey’s birthday now. And is never anything expensive, i.e., a pair of boots for winter, or maybe a purse. Fortunately she’s never been a fan of expensive jewelry since she losses everything so I’m off the hook on the jewelry front. In Christmas though my gift is to foot the bill for all the presents my wife buys to almost everyone who has crossed paths with us: our children’s teachers, doctors, neighbors, her family, my family. Every year I’ll tell her: “don’t include me in the card; I don’t even remember these people”. After a couple of years I realized that giving away presents is her thing and that’s what makes her happy.
A computer as a Christmas gift? That’s almost as bad as getting her a vacuum.
Laptop is a Hanukkah present. Jewelry is a Chrismas present.
Vacuum was birthday.
I hate you all.
sounds like a thoughtful gift then…dont mind the haters
^ Agreed. In this case a laptop is indeed a good gift. A $500 windows laptop would have been more than enough, but what the hell. Buy her a Milky Way as the next gift and you’re good.
I agree with the others that a MacBook air is a wasted gift on a chick. They have zero appreciation for that stuff. You’d almost be better off buying them a vacuum cleaner as they would at least use that. MacBook air will just be a very expensive 2k charger for her iPhone/iPad.
2k earrings would equal definite bj.
In terms of how much I’m cheap. I never give gifts to really anyone unless a great idea pops through my head. But yeah, you probably don’t want to be like me but hear out my rationale for being this way. Never in my life, either as a boyfriend or a manager, has being generous with money been rewarded in the long run. In fact it invariably works against you for the moment you cannot afford to be generous, which happens to all of us at some point, your past kindness is completely forgotten.