One for the old timers ‘It’s Just No Fun Anymore!’ ‘Hey, what is it working in the financial markets these days ? It’s just no fun anymore. There are so many rules and regulations now, so many ‘dos’ and ‘don’ts’. I just can’t get my head around it all. I’ve been in the markets for a few years now, and last night I sat down and wrote a list of all the things I used to enjoy, but am now not allowed to do - you know, all the stuff that made it really worthwhile coming to work. Here’s my list: 1. You can’t slip to the loo off the trading floor and do a line of coke. 2. You can’t sell crap products to clients 3. You can’t take long lunch hours, and come back to the office a little tipsy (or, more likely, blind drunk). 4. You can’t come in wearing casual dress, and enjoy a smoke in the office. 5. You can’t have a laugh with your colleagues at someone else’s expense. 6. You can’t send around ‘inappropriate’ joke e-mails. 7. You can’t take the mickey out of minorities. 8. You can’t hire your mates. And if you recruit a secretary, she actually has to have good computer skills! 9. You can’t tell Compliance to ‘ off’ when they pick you up for trading over your limits. 10. You can’t take clients to adult entertainment clubs, put hookers on expenses or indulge in a little dwarf-tossing. 11. You can’t bag a decent bonus and quickly move on, leaving a ticking time bomb behind. 12. Hell, you can’t even engage in insider trading without getting caught! What are things coming to ? Things ain’t what they used to be’.

I’m told that you can still do a couple of those things in London - the lunch and booze, in particular.

" 2. You can’t sell crap products to clients " Posh, you’ll always be able to sell crappy products, just need to dress them up differently as risk diversifiers. Also, I heard that Jeffries still allows dwarf tossing

Carl Monday investigative reporting: absolutely hilarious It is SFW

I’ve heard about the dwarf tossing incident. amazing

^^ Please share.


Wolf of Wall Street.

First result, FYI. Amazing

nuppal Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > First result, FYI. > > Amazing > > > ng-order-flow-for-tickets-cigars-dwarf-tossing/ Outrageous, this article besmirches the good name of Fidelity, must all be lies :wink: