reading body language

Anyone know of a good book on the subject? Seems like a good skill to have for negotiating, dealing w/ coworkers, or employers. Not to mention reading what the wife is thinking, because they can’t seem to say what they mean. I am a little sceptical as to whether or not it’s hard science or just voodoo.

In addition to body language I want to learn to read microexpressions. I read Blink a week or so ago and it got me interested. www . mettonline . com

This guy spoke at an investment conference I went to a few months ago. Not sure I found it terribly useful, but he seems to be an expert in the field and has written a few books. http://jnforensics.com/

This is a topic I am really interested in, but don’t have a specific book recommendation on the subject. I would echo the recommendation for learning about microexpressions, though, which you can read about here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Facial_Action_Coding_System It’s not hard science but it’s not voodoo either. People have predictable and involuntary reactions to a wide variety of events – the key is being able to spot the reactions since they are usually fleeting and subtle. I have the ability to spot a lie on someone’s face with a high degree of accuracy without any prior training (well, maybe if you count poker), so I don’t know if it’s something that can be taught or is an innate “skill.” It seems to come in handy often when meeting with management teams since management credibility is always a large part of the investment calculus and small cap managers seem to lie fairly regularly (it’s fun when you know they’re lying and get to bust on them). I would caution you against using the same process to analyze women though, since let’s be honest, women are irrational most of the time and it’s hard to tell what they are thinking under the best of circumstances (they may not even know!) :slight_smile:

^yea i guess i would be making the same old mistake of applying logic to women’s behavior, fruitless. good info, thx.

Seems like a topic that could be more detrimental than useful for someone without a lot of practice and experience. For instance, an expert may be able to infer useful information, but a novice may reach wrong conclusions and at the same time waste energy that could be better used in thinking about responses, conversation planning etc. Thats my opinion.

^that crossed my mind. it’s all part of the mosaic you build for making decisions; i’m sure i wouldn’t rely on it too heavily as a non-expert.

if he eats the cookie… fold

If she takes her clothes off, long.

It is called instinct, yes what instinct is doing is calculating millions of little body language cues and processing them, but it is happening at the subconscious level…and you *just know*. Chicks have this power, much more developed. Dad is actually a legendary mind reader so I know all about this, one of his employees told me he needs to put up a psychic shield, block all thoughts from his head and the accompanying body language or the boss can in some eerie way know what he is up to. Dear old dad is a master salesman who could sell snow to Eskimos. It is just instinct and being able to read people’s true nature, interests and desires. If you need to read a book your hosed, try meditating.

not hungry?

purealpha Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > > If you need to read a book your hosed, try > meditating. yea that’s a good point. this will save me lots of money. if my daughter can’t seem to figure out her long division, i’ll just tell her she has bad instincts and we’ll skip the tutor. maybe spend the money on gossip magazines and video games instead.

Not sure what any of that has to do with anything…but maybe her instincts are in the arts instead of math.

purealpha Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > It is called instinct, yes what instinct is doing > is calculating millions of little body language > cues and processing them, but it is happening at > the subconscious level…and you *just know*. > Chicks have this power, much more developed. > > Dad is actually a legendary mind reader so I know > all about this, one of his employees told me he > needs to put up a psychic shield, block all > thoughts from his head and the accompanying body > language or the boss can in some eerie way know > what he is up to. Dear old dad is a master > salesman who could sell snow to Eskimos. It is > just instinct and being able to read people’s true > nature, interests and desires. > > If you need to read a book your hosed, try > meditating. Dude, is your father Chinese by any chance? I’ve known a couple of Chinese guys who are like that, and they are impressive. It’s like, “wow this dude really knows his mind-reading stuff”.

I agree that unless you’re an expert, you shouldn’t rely too heavily on your interpertations of other people’s body language. That being said, it is constructive to read a book or listen to a seminar on some of the basics of non-verbal communication. In sales and negoations, I have found it helpful to be able to pick up on some of the subtle nonverbal cues people subconsciously give off (cross arms or legs, power temples, raised eyebrows, etc…); but only consider this information as part of the overall dialogue; ie it helps guide my actions but doesn’t dictate them. I recommend a seminar, not a book - better to see examples in person, either through pictures or from a person, than to read about it.

Ha naw he ain’t Chinese. He spent his youth in nature watching birds and stuff…guess it developed a part of his brain that is totally natural but most Americans seem to have lost. Once, I watched him sell some lady a purchase that was 1000% over the budget she walked in with, the lady just couldn’t wait to get her wallet out and give his company all her money, and then go brag to all her friends. Amazing, even though I (theoretically) understand how he does it, it is almost like witchcraft to behold.

sorry, I don’t see the correlation between being a good orthinologist and a good sales man.

I know you don’t, that’s the thing. :wink:

lol touche sir, touche. hahaha

I would also be interested to learn face reading…I tried hard finding such a book but couldn’t. Someone I knew was an expert in face reading, he would see someone’s face and he would describe in detail how the personality of the person is like.