I’m not a big athlete myself, but getting exercise has good anti-depression effects. I tend to run, but not in the winter so much. I recommend it.
Even getting out for a walk is good. Sitting at home on a couch just tends to intensify the effect of depression, so be aware of that and avoid it.
Most of us have had very dark thoughts at some point in our lives. Remember that most of the world couldn’t care whether you passed your exam or not, so it’s nothing to be ashamed of in front of all but a select few (and may be not even them). As for losing a job, that sucks, but lots of people have lost jobs and are still worthwhile people, so nothing to be ashamed of.
We live in a world that seems to tell us that if we aren’t one of the 100 best people on the planet in whatever our chosen field is, then we don’t deserve not to live in extreme deprivation. So we get nervous that unemployment means that we are worthless. But that’s BS. That’s just a myth so that winners in the winner-take-all economy we’ve created can feel good about themselves.
I had a friend tell me once that “Happiness comes from meeting achievable goals.” Set a few goals that you think you can achieve, even if it’s just reading up on some skill area or taking a walk. It’s often the direction of progress that affects our mood more than the absolute amount.
Yeah bchad is dead on. Hit up the gym, get out there, continue the flow of meeting people, and after making a concrete direction of the path you wish to take in life (ie through goals, plans, etc), don’t be afraid to tell someone. They might be able to help. There is a difference between having the blues and major depression. If it is the latter you’re going to need some kind of counseling, behavioral therapy (usually on coping mechanisms), and possibly chemical therapy (or a combination). If suicidal ideation gets stronger, seek immediate medical attention.
Keep fighting OP, I promise it will pay off in the end. The danger here is letting yourself go; start doing shit, anything you find interesting is fine. Reach out to peeps too, the few times I’ve fallen into depression I had forgotten how people around me are important. Try making new friends as well (sign up for cooking/acting/writing/painting classes or something).