Uh, because in a virtual environment you can change those things overnight. Of course, things may get awkward when your date is expecting 6’ and you walk in at 5’6, but with lifts and hanging from the monkey bars for a few hours, you could probably get to about 5’9". That’s probably acceptable, especially given that from what I understand every guy under 6’2" adds an inch to their profile height anyhow.
I mean, you’ll have to learn to lie a lot about ballroom dancing, building furniture or whatever women want guys to be into. But here’s the thing: if you lie about it enough then it becomes your reality. Pretty soon even you won’t know that you don’t know how to dance the fox trot or that you actually didn’t build that table that looks suspiciously like Pottery Barn.
So I’ll add my 2 cents. I played around with online dating last 2 months. Background - I’m fit, 6’2 (for reals), generally accepted to be good looking. Fact 1# - mediocre girls definitely get wayy to much attention on these sites. I mean for shits and giggles I’d msg someone who I wouldn’t look twice at in a bar setting, and sometimes I wouldn’t get a response. LOL? Smoking hot chicks pretty much have the god complex online (and are pretty few and rare in between). Met a few 7’s who turned out to be legit 7’s… Went to meet some 8’s that turned out to be 6’s and 5’s (damn photoshop). Overall, I found it an entertaining suplement to meeting girls in real life, but honestly, it seems that the guy to girl ratio is so damn high, that if you got any game, you are better off honeybadging chicks in real social settings. It’s definitely easy though, if you got the goods, I went on 2-3 dates a week, being semi-picky.
The point wasn’t about “investing emotionally” into the other person, it was about obtaining competitive intelligence about the opponent so that you could adjust your strategy. I can change my approach even if I can’t change my height.
Since I’m too short for the nightclubs, I got my girls through Internet gaming where the female players can’t see how short I am. I didn’t grow taller, but I put myself in a situation where they got to know me and “forgave” my height afterwards.
EDIT: One might think that girls who play video games are fat and ugly. I assure you that they were NOT fat and ugly. I’m still in shock at my good fortune:)
Nah, I decided the next day that I shouldn’t go … Guess his chatting style was so charming that night that I was lured, which is actually quite a rare thing that someone could be able to make me feel interested :). In fact, I’m open-minded enough to have the first date right after the first chat, but go right to his apartment is still a bit too fast. Need further due-d’ or even if my precaution turns him off, it’s fine too. The other question that I keep wondering is if I’m too cautious, coz there’s another saying & proposition that, life is short, live it, take risk, even if it doesn’t last long, at least you have a good time and memory that you can keep to warm up your soul (well, enough cheesy stuff on Saturday lol).
Btw it’s not the M&A and buy-side thing that interested me. I have worked in some of the M&A and in evaluation for buy-side so it’s not a thing that I’m crazy for. Seriously, who care about your profession or credential? As long as you earn a good living by yourself and don’t sell your soul for cheapcake, that would be fine…
Who here is doing this shit in NYC? All I can say is…
The thirst is REAL.
I was out there for work and reactivated my account- it took me about an hour in the morning to have hair stylst to go to happy hour with, and a fashionista designer chick to grab dinner with the same day… I even had a possible 3rd option if those didnt work out.
CA is nothing like that, online dating is such a waste of time here.
Agreed. The talent on oncupid in NYC is unreal. Most of what I have at home in TX is 10% hot chicks, 30% 6-7s, and 60% of chicks you’d rather hacksaw off your dick than go out with.
Are you serious, why waste his time. This is what frustrates me so much about your gender - i swear if he paid little attention to you, you would be on his knob asap rocky but instead this guy makes an effort, says the right things, and you dont even counter offer with a public spot. Disgraceful!
Why counteroffer. Inviting a woman to your apartment after a chat (vs a public place) is so forward that I think the woman is completely justified in crossing him off her list entirely, if she’s inclined. It’s incredibly unsafe for her, and he should know it, and if she’s going to make herself vulnerable to him, the least he can do is recognize it and present himself in place where she can be safe. If he’s too cheap to pay for a beer or something, or bother to get dreassed and go meet her somewhere, why should she open up her legs?
If she’s feeling frisky and into it, and is willing to take the risk for a one-nighter, that’s fine, but if she want’s something more like a relationship, why even bother with someone who can’t be expected to be minimally considerate.
I would have to see her in person first. Don’t forget, you see the best pics. The last thing I want is to see a fugly enter my place and feel obligated to spend an hour or 2 with her. At least at a public place, you can bounce after a beer and she has no idea where you live.
By learning preferences of one woman you do not learn preferences of all women. Unless you chose to think all women think alike and want the same things, in which case I have no piece of advice for you.
My point was that by letting those girls that rejected you go; you save yourself time and allow the natural filters do the job of sifting out the most probable dead ends. Why convince those girls you aren’t that bad even if not 6’+ or whatever, when instead you can concentrate on women without the dumb height criteria?
When I did the online thing I used to always operate on the $20 exit. We’d meet for a drink and if I wasn’t feeling it I’d slap down my $20 (I’d get a beer ~$5 and she’d usually get a ~$11 glass of wine) and say nice to meet you, I have to get going. She gets a free drink, the bartender gets a tip and I get out of there. Best possible ending to that scenario.
