Sup Numi,
How did this work out for you? I’m tempted to join a reputable site (ie NOT POF, OKC, DateHookUp, CL, etc) and roll the dice.
What’s wrong with OkCupid, Plenty of Fish, How about we? I don’t see why they have to be lumped in with Craigslist. Lets make tiers.
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Match
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OkCupid, PoF, Tinder, How About We
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Craigslist, Single 50+ Sites, Adult Friend Finder
isnt it up to your parents who you end up with anyways
I realize this is over a month old, but I haven’t looked at this thread in a long time. Anyway, just wanted to say - Guys hate teaching women stuff. It’s amazingly frustrating and the only reason we put up with it is for, well, obvious reasons.
There is no tier 3. Top 2 or hacksaw.
And don’t forget Backpage.
Good to know. I hate being taught, esp if it’s on the border of mansplaining…
See the post on the first page about OKC, PoF, and those other 2 I haven’t heard of. Tired of sorting through rubble for the few gems. Paid sites separate the gems from the gold diggers.
Hey man, I know a number of folks that met their significant other on OKC. From the brief bit that I saw, that site can be like shooting fish in a barrel especially if you are a reasonably accomplished, sociable and confident guy. Especially once you hit the demographic of women that are nearing 30+ and still single – and there are a LOT of them on OKC – a shotgun approach there can yield a lot of benefits.
My initial thought was that because OKC was free, the signal-to-noise ratio would be pretty low, but in fact there are quite a few quality girls on that site. I’ve heard all too often guys try to craft some lines that they think are clever or hilarious, but end up trying too hard and blowing themselves up.
On the contrary, if you’re already charming and intelligent, I feel like girls just open up to you and they won’t unleash some sh!t test on you as so often happens in NYC. My sense is that girls on that site, aside from the ones that get pinged a million times a day, just want to cut to the chase and find someone. Whether that’s just for one night or for the long haul, nobody wants to waste their time and that’s why there’s a need for online dating in the first place. And when I say nobody wants to waste their time, what I mean are two things: (1) if you are confident and can make a girl laugh, things move that much faster; and (2) when you try to “slow play” things, girls sometimes just want it even more and will “fast play” things for you if you know what I’m saying. Gotta make them earn their keep!!
You might want to give the site a try – what’s your downside? Doesn’t cost you anything. Personally, I had expected to be enjoying the singles scene longer but got looped back into a relationship again. Don’t get me wrong, things are good, but it’s only when someone’s in a relationship again that one wished they’d made more of the days when they didn’t have any strings attached. Nonetheless, from relatively brief period when I was single, I’d say my experiences were “good” to “great” and bordering on “awesome.”
^ I read stuff like that and realize that my city just must not be that good for girls on okc. When I was in NYC this summer and pulled out the app on my phone I noticed way more attractive women then I see here at home.
ding ding ding…NYC is loaded with dimes
^ Yup. Madison Ave 101.
Numi, I think you should cast a template of what an ideal profile is. You know we know that you’re the man in all things from finance to playing tennis. How would you suggest a brotha like me position myself in the best light in order to attract that quality you claim is there (I only say claim, is I did a short stint on OKC and found what I described on page 1). I’m willing to try it again, however, I don’t want to get slogged down with BS, desparation, gold diggers, and what not.
CFAvsMBA, as I think I’ve discussed on here, I’ve done OKC and it was fun and I had some good times out of it. One chick did stand me up, which was annoying, but I should have realized she was a flake when I found out she was an masseuse/acupuncturist. I just wanted a rubdown.
One warning on OKC though, my black friends say that their experience is way different, and they usually got fed up in the first week or so. I suspect it has something to do with the “threatening black man” stereotype. Only black guy I know that had success is a fashion photographer, so his profile was insane, glitzy and he looking about as nonthreatening as possible in all of his pictures because of his fancy clothes and the setting.
I use brotha jokingly to suffice the AF affirmitive action requirement. In all reality I’m like a mix of these two guys. I played basketball at my hacksaw university and got a partial scholarship, but I had the stats at the caboose of the team.
CvM, I joined match a while back to subsidize my nightlife BC I don’t always wanna drop mad coin and end up with a hangover from the bars. It did yield some dimes, but more often a quick lay with some chicks that I wouldn’t let my friends see me in public with. Then I had to deal with them getting all pissed at me when I didn’t want to see them anymore. It wasn’t even worth it, I’m meeting hotter chicks IRL who I get to establish a connection with instantly in real life. I don’t even log in to match anymore even though it’s paid for.
Anyways, find some young professionals networking events. I just started going to these and they’re full of young hot chicks with jobs. Seriously, it’s a gold mine. Best high quality ratio I’ve ever seen.
Also, I read online that you should join a dating site for ppl that want to commit adultery, like Ashley Madison. But here’s the kicker, pretend to be married and look for someone that wants to be with a married man, obviously this chick will have issues but you’ll prolly have unreal sex. I’m thinking about doing it for the lulz. Just tell her you have your own apt BC of relationship issues at home, also have pics in a suit, and wear one when you meet her… She wants a 50 shades of gray experience
I go to these whenever they come up and I agree. Hot young chicks with better than average jobs.
When I was in NYC 6 years ago, I did both Match and eHarmony at the same time. Match for 3 months and eHarmony for 6 months (overlapping). It was insane.
I went on about 35 first dates, maybe 10 seconds, 6-7 thirds, and a handful of girls made it to the money rounds. I did this in the space of about 4 months. Started slow but eventually got insane. I’d have weeks where I had 3 weeknight dates and 3 weekend dates.
What I learned:
Keep your profile simple. Don’t try to be too clever. Put a couple of good pictures and that’s it. As a matter of fact keep everything simple and light in initial contact until you meet the chic.
First dates - a quick weeknight drink after work, or coffee on a weekend morning. Keep it simple. I never did dinner on a first date.
Match - this site is a crapshoot. You can contact 3 or 300 girls a day if you want, but girls don’t like it because creepy 50 year old dudes can email them. I liked Match at first and then started to hate it. PLUS - anyone (even non-members) can see you are on match. Also, it shows others how often you are online, whcih I hated (makes it seem like you have no life but Match).
eHarmony - this site started out slower, but got better over time, and I ended up meeting my wife through it. They send you 7 matches a day - that’s it. At first I was like “WTF, that’s all I get!??!” But after a while it is hard to keep up with it. Once you are seeing 1 or 2 or 3 girls regularly, it’s becomes “enough already!!” I would recommend this over Match.
NYC is THE PLACE to do online dating. Transportation is easy, and there are massive amounts of beautiful single women in a very small area.
Good luck fellas.
I heard eharmony is geared towards religious people. Is that true?
Kinda true. It’s kinda like Chick-Fil-A. It’s not “religious”, per se, but the founders are pretty devout.
It was started by religious people, and refused to do same-sex matches for a long time. They got sued, and now they offer same-sex matching.
But anybody can use it. You don’t have to be a professed, born-again Christian to use it.
I heard eharmony is geared towards people who want to lock in marriage fast.
match is a younger crowd, and OKC is for cheap and free, can still find decent matches though
eHarmony tries to bill it’s brand as “wholesome,” and designed for long-term relationships along traditional lines. More religious people are probably disproportionately attracted to that, whereas more secular people might find it a bit “vanilla” for their tastes.