I’ll kick a few tips your way. I’m far from a Brah who knows what to say and when. But I do get out of my comfort zone and speak to women whom my friends would list untouchable.
Couple of things. Smile alot, be energetic, and look happy. I find that hitting a bar right after a workout is the best. I’m fit, lit, and ain’t taking no sht.
Beginner Game - Walk up to female(s) of interest and say in so many words (verbatim for me), “Excuse me, can I ask you something? Are you from around here?” If they say yes, say “Me too.” or “I’m not, I’m from xxx.” Then stretch out your hand and say, “By the way, I’m Frank, nice to meet you.” Be completely genuine. This is about as simple as it gets but if you are sincere, it will work. I use this alot since I’m a pretty dumb guy. Continue asking questions that come up. The person who asks questions controls the conversation flow. Remember this.
Intermediate Game - Find a group of females of interest. Approach the hottest girl in the group and run beginner game. The twist is you need to start asking the hottest girl questions about a friend of hers who is far less attractive. The reverse phsychology will put this girl in a tizzy since she’ll be wondering wtf is wrong with her compared to her less attractive friend. I use this game after 5+ drinks and when I don’t care about being as sincere. It’s amusing.
Advanced Game - Pick up the book, “The Game.” I’m not elite enough to comment in this area.
Buffet told me to stay in my circle of competence…but we’ll see…with all the reading I don’t even have the energy to go to clubs/bars anymore…i have basically resigned to the fact stocks is what I was meant to do…hot classy babes would be a bonus…
Beginner game: ask a lot of questions and listen. pick up on the answers and ask more questions Advanced game: make statements (no questions at this stage, be bold, she will follow up on your statements)
oh,and no amount of advice will work if you are not willing to take rejection. You’d be surprised how many people would like to get to know you better. You’ll never know if you don’t try, and part of trying is getting rejected.
can you please share your rejection stories? how did you deal with it? how often does it happen?
Constant rejection. I deal with it by posting all about it on AF.
The important thing is to be cool. I achieved this by buying a sweet Wham! poster that I use as a conversation point to impress the ladies.
I got rejectrf like 5 years ago while I was in grad school…was devastated… haven’t really asked out a girl since then…ever since I have taken only the sure thing, which like stocks, came once or twice a year and as of lately, even more seldom… i have noticed my style of investing is much like my approach to girls …i tend to focus on one girl and put the bulk of my cake in that basket…I dont like distressed situations or one offs…
I LOLed here. Sounds eerily familiar to me…Follow a stock for years and open your position at the right time.
Frank, you can’t look at it as a binary accept/reject decision. Think of it as a buy/hold/sell. The female may buy into you, hold you, or sell you. So long as you are polite, professional, and mature, you’ll fall into the buy/hold category. Only if you are unsure of yourself or way too arrogant will you fall in the sell category. Much like BB recos, only 15% of the time do I fall in the Sell category. And I’m far from an Usher type of brother. I just do game #1 above. Be cool and have fun. This is not work like stock picking is.
do you guys get chicks picking you up? suppose you’re walking around on wallstreet/baystreet or whatever, do hot classy babes come up and start talking to you?
Frank, here’s the 3 points of game that I lived by - and I was a decent slayer in my prime. No matter the approach (mine typically went down, like literally, at the bar - like the bar where on the other side was a bartender - I’d always offer to buy a drink - this is the best intro but involves timing - some people think this is chumpish and a waste of money - but I don’t care - easiest intro in the book - you can even just send drinks to hotties - this strategy is admittedly pretty chumpish, but if you’ve got the cash it’s like a marketing spend - might seem worthless until you close the deal you otherwise wouldn’t have). 1) When talking, make whatever is being said is a secret. I’d usually hit them with a ‘what?’, even if I heard them, and then put my ear by their mouth, listen to whatever they said (that I likely heard the first time), and then get all the way in their ear with my response. Obviously, don’t lick her ear discussion one, but progressively you can close the gap which may lead to #2: 2) Blow past the touch barrier. Sometimes in the convo you’ll have some facial-to-facial contact, sometimes it’ll be in a laugh or whatever but there should be some contact. I try to be kind of a funny dude, so generally a chick would laugh and I’d touch right above the pelvis and bring her in with some sort of followup (all up in her ear) to what I said that was funny. A dude I know always throws his thumb in a chick’s belt loop, which eventually follows up with fingers in the back pocket. Whatever your move, get your touch on. 3) Use their name, a lot. Some people with more advanced game or whatever say call them the wrong name / whatever, I never rolled like that. Another thing I’d do is be the first person to break the conversation off, and say, well hey - great talking to you - let me give you my phone # so we can get together some time. This surprisingly worked a decent amount of the time. There are a lot of mind games and that type of crap that dude’s pull (and some of the above probably falls into that category), but I think that stuff is BS. CFAvsMBA is spot on about being genuine and nice, but you’ve gotta have a little swagger and sometimes be kind of an a$$ (depending on the chick - but the ones you want probably require this). You gotta love yourself baby, or how can you expect somebody else to? And the most critical thing is, as stated, you can’t fear the rejection. The most successful people you know learned from rejection and are better for it. Get back on the saddle or whatever the motto is and get it in my friend.
thx man…but i don’t frequent bars…what about babes around the office areas?
Steve Jobs randomly met his wife in a parking lot. He walked across the parking lot and asked her out, then blew off some meeting. Of course, this might work better if you are Steve Jobs. Otherwise, I imagine you might be accused of being a rapist.
Also I believe she carefully stalked him and presented him the opportunity to do that.
jcole is giving great advice here. don’t fear the rejection and have confidence! Bring on the classy babes!
Don Draper is awesome…i like Joan…classy babe…can’t wait for the new season…
Hmm. I think Mad Men works for both men and women. Women like all the social drama in the show. Men like to project themselves as Don Draper - a successful man who bangs basically every woman he meets. He bangs some hippy girl, his hot female client, the consultant hired by his company, his other female client, his daughter’s hot teacher, some young chick right after divorcing his wife, his secretary, the cleaning lady, his other secretary… well, you get the idea. I’m sure you have fantasized about banging many women you meet. Don Draper is a character based on the world where you actually can bang all those people.
I thought Don Draper was based on a true story…